Jun. 20th, 2017

the_rck: (Default)
I slept terribly last night. My body wouldn't relax enough for sleeping for the first few hours. I'm pretty sure that it was mostly stress over needing to go out today for an appointment. I should have taken an Ativan, but getting up to do it seemed like way too much effort.

Cordelia dragged me out of bed in a panic at midnight because she'd looked at the bus website and discovered that the bus she'd planned to take to the Traverwood library today and Thursday is detoured and won't go there. There's a chunk of the route that's completely closed, so they have a bus (the A shuttle) covering the part of the route from our place to the closed area and then a bus (the B shuttle) covering from the closed area to the other end of the route. The first bus, on its way back toward downtown, takes a longish detour out to Kroger in order to let people transfer to the bus for the other half of the route. That other half seems to go to the library, but it looks like it would take a good bit longer than the normal route.

Right now, the plan is for Cordelia to catch either the A shuttle just as it starts its detour to Kroger or the bus that normally runs up and down that road and to get off at the street that leads to the library. She'll have to cross a busy road, but there's a light there, and I don't think the walk is all that far. It is possibly farther than I could comfortably walk right now, but I can't walk all that far.

I'm glad to know about the detour because that's the bus I would normally take to get to Kroger, and I'd have absolutely panicked if I got to the point where the road is closed and didn't know what was going on. I don't like the other bus option for getting there, even though the trip is shorter, because it requires crossing five lanes of traffic and because I'm not quite sure where the stop is along there.

Cordelia went downtown to the library yesterday because she had some holds that came in late on Sunday, after we'd already been down there. She was really pleased by how easy it was to get there and is trying to get me to suggest destinations that she might enjoy.

I'm hoping that my psychiatrist (who I'll see today) will have some ideas for making the c-PAP work. All of the alternatives available to me sound pretty terrible. I think it's possible that she'll tell me to take Ativan every night for a week or two to see if I get to the point where my brain accepts that the c-PAP doesn't actually reduce my chances of surviving an emergency. I'm pretty sure that that's my basic problem, and it's not amenable to me wearing the gear while awake to get used to it because it's not the gear that's the problem-- It's my sense that, when asleep, I'm hugely vulnerable and can't afford anything that makes me less able to react. This is a problem that I've had with medications that make me mentally fuzzy.

Today's to do list )

August 2017

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