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I have my assignment for Captive Audience. I will let it stew in the back of my mind for the next week while I work on my second [community profile] pod_together story. Right now, I'm thinking I want to do something with ghosts visiting Sydney for the Pod Together story. I've got several reasonable candidates, but I think I may have to rewatch a couple of episodes if I want to use Kyle because, every time I try to remember who he is, I get Michael Weston from Burn Notice instead.

Right now, I'm leaning heavily toward Sydney being a much less nice person than canon seems to have wanted us to believe. I just can't buy into the idea that he spent that long at The Centre without having a much clearer idea of what was going on than he ever admits.

I am still looking for someone to brainstorm with me and to bounce ideas off of.

The Nonconathon fics have been revealed but are still anonymous. I wrote for it but didn't sign up, so I didn't receive a fic. Three of the fics I wrote are treats while the fourth is a pinch hit. I've gotten nice comments from the recipients of the three treats, and the archive's only been open about two and a half hours. I'm not expecting all that much in the way of comments or kudos because, in my experience, noncon porn doesn't get that so much.

Scott has taken Cordelia and two of her friends to see Spider-man. Only one of the four of them hasn't seen it once already. I'm not clear on whether or not Scott intends to watch it again, too, or just find something else to occupy his time while it's running. Our GPS tracking app shows him still at the theater, and the movie was scheduled to start ten minutes ago, so maybe?

I ended up feeling pretty rotten most of yesterday after I posted here. I ended up spending a lot of time on Facebook because I couldn't focus enough to do anything else. I had gas and was burping a lot. I asked Scott to pick up some carbonated water on his way home last night, and he did. That helped a little by forcing the burps out. Scott and I ended up turning off the light a little after 10, and we both slept until about 8 this morning. I used the c-PAP until about 4:30.
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Cordelia's best friend's family needs to move this summer, so it's now kind of up in the air as to which high school she'll end up attending. It will depend on whether or not they find a house to buy and where or if they need to move to another rental somewhere. I know they want to stay on this side of town because the girl's mother works at the VA hospital and needs to commute by bus. I've referred them to the buyer's agent we worked with, and I warned them about the Orangeburg sewer line problem that many houses have. A collapsed sewer line is both horribly expensive and beyond inconvenient. The city keeps a database of where Orangeburg lines have been replaced, and they recommend using it to see if the house you're interested in has had it replaced and/or is in a neighborhood where other houses have. A lot of these neighborhoods were built all at once.

I ended up spending about three hours at an urgent care clinic last night. I think that, every time my body does something weird now, my clinic's triage nurses are going to look at my medical records and panic because it could be something terrible. In this case, one round of the standard PT for vertigo (the Epley maneuver) seems to have settled things completely.

I missed my window for dinner, so all I ate after lunch yesterday was an applesauce pouch. I had grabbed it on the way to the urgent care clinic because it had already been five hours since lunch. We tried to pick up a vanilla frosty on the way home, but the Wendy's was out of vanilla, so I was SOL on that front.

Scott and Cordelia went to the class picnic without me (and still got to the clinic to pick me up before I was actually done). Scott sent me a picture of Cordelia and some of her classmates wading. There's a lot of bean salad leftover. When I tried some this morning, I was irritated to discover that some of the beans were actually crunchy. I used pre-cooked, canned beans. Crunchy is not something I wanted or expected, and it probably explains why there's so much leftover. I'm not sure what to do about that at this point. I don't want to eat crunchy beans, but I can't exactly pull out the problematic ones to cook them further now.
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I'm still dizzy off and on. It's worse when I get overheated, and it's more likely to happen when I'm sitting or lying down than when I'm walking. It doesn't seem to relate to head movement in that it can happen when I'm lying completely still or when my upper body is still and I move one of my legs. I think that a lot of sleep helped some but not entirely. Extra water is not helpful at all. I don't have any other symptoms, so I'm not dreadfully worried, but I called UHS to see if they want me to try to come in to see someone. A nurse is supposed to call me back about that.

Apparently, it's not possible for me to get a different c-PAP face mask any time in the next ninety days because of insurance limitations. I could have gotten one if I'd managed to make it to Medequip on the Monday after my sleep disorders clinic appointment (which was on a Friday) because that was the last day of the thirty day window for making changes. I'm very, very frustrated by this. Medequip insists that it doesn't matter what insurance I have because they're all exactly the same on this. I'm not sure I buy that, but... Time to email the sleep disorders clinic people.

My laptop is crashing on me from time to time. I'm pretty sure it's the battery because the precipitating event each time has been the power supply connection getting abruptly separated. I can unplug, sometimes, without a crash, but it's a crapshoot at this point. I'm making sure to save everything before I move from one room to another. We've ordered a new battery, but we opted not to pay extra to get it tomorrow. It should arrive on Monday.

My parents made it here in time for Cordelia's graduation. As it happened, they needed to pick up a couple of doors from the local lumberyard (They were looking for something very specific, and nobody else had two doors like that).

The graduation was not quite forty minutes long. It was early enough in the day that it wasn't utterly sweltering in the multi-purpose room. I still had problems, but I'm having trouble at home where it's 78F, so... Yeah. I recorded the ceremony for Scott, but I don't think I got a high quality version. We were so far back that mostly I got backs of other parents' heads, and my arms and hands shook a lot while I held the camera. Cordelia sang with three other girls, and she was one of two students to get a Phoenix Award for exemplifying the qualities the STEAM program wants to encourage, including leadership and academic excellence.

There was a short reception on the concrete patio just outside the multi-purpose room after the ceremony. There was bottled water and cookies and fruit (for some reason no one touched the half bananas which were all turning brown on the exposed bits.

My parents and I went to Cardamom, a nearby Indian restaurant, for lunch. My mother was disappointed that her medium spicy dish was too mild. In my experience, the level of spice there varies wildly. I suspect that different cooks set mild and medium at very different degrees of heat. After lunch, they helped me run an errand that required going out to Cordelia's doctor's office to get a form signed and faxed to Skyline before the end of school day tomorrow (which will be only a half day). It was just a form that says that it's okay to give her standard OTC medications if need arises. It had to have a parent signature and a doctor signature. I suppose the latter is just in case I failed to realize that Tums or cough drops might set off Cordelia's non-existent allergies or something. I found the form irritating because I was supposed to list everything that I gave permission for. I just wanted to sign something that says that, during the week she's at camp, the nurse should use their best judgment as to what she needs to take. I'm sure I can't think of all of the possibilities.

Right now, I'm trying to decide whether or not I'm up to going to the class potluck tonight. It will be out of doors (the indoor venues were about six times more expensive), and I'm not sure how well I can handle the heat even if I'm just sitting in the shade.

I have a bit of carryover from yesterday's to do list:

Return the call that came in Tuesday while I was at my appointment
Email my sister to find out if she really can get a free viola for Cordelia
See if I can figure out how to retrieve my iTunes playlists
Find a plot or something for my NPT fic

I also need to:

Shower.

The Skyline nurse is supposed to call me tomorrow morning (I reached her today while she was in the middle of things).
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Okay, I think I need to move the nap up my list of priorities. I'm feeling lightheaded with occasional dizziness (is dizziness the right term when I sometimes look at words on a page and they swirl?), and fatigue is the most likely cause. I looked at what I've eaten and at how much water I've had. I haven't started any new meds. I don't have other symptoms. The dizziness doesn't seem to relate to what position I'm in, standing, sitting, or lying down. It might relate to me turning rapidly which would make an inner ear thing more likely, I think.

I considered going out to the grocery store because Scott didn't get everything I needed for making the bean salad (I was a bit too ambiguous on the grocery list) and because having some snacks for when friends come over this evening would be nice. It just seems like a terrible idea if I might have a sudden few seconds of dizziness while, say, crossing a street.

I have at least managed almost everything I need to do that requires walking around. I think this is a good reason to order delivery for lunch rather than trying to cook.
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I survived my mammogram. It didn't show any sign of problems. The whole thing was very, very stressful because they made me wait an hour after the mammogram before telling me that it was okay for me to get dressed and leave. My SIL wasn't allowed to wait with me, and I wasn't allowed to have my cell phone on. I hadn't brought a book because I hadn't realized that either of those things would be true. The magazines in the waiting room were all things that I couldn't bring myself to try to read. The New Yorker seemed too difficult, and Family Circle seemed like the sort of thing where I'd look at it and not actually be able to understand why I was doing it. The TV was set on HGTV which-- Well, at least it wasn't Fox News, right?

I came close to crying a few times while I was waiting, and that got worse as time went on and I realized that I might not make it to my next appointment (a follow up at radiation oncology) on time even though everyone had assured me I would. I got to that with one minute to spare, but it was a very, very near thing.

I managed a couple of loads of laundry and filling and running the dishwasher and getting the trash and the recycling out in the morning before my appointment.
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I'm feeling a good bit better today. I'm still sneezing off and on, but the headache is gone, and I'm less tired than I was.

Scott, Cordelia, and one of Cordelia's friends have gone off to see Wonder Woman. The showing was due to start about five minutes ago.

We're attempting to retrieve my music files right now. A huge file has been downloading to my computer for about the last sixteen hours. It's maybe two thirds of the way done, so I expect it will be going for a considerable while yet. I probably won't know until tomorrow morning whether or not I really have the files. Scott thinks he might be able to retrieve the applications that I lost, too, but those are much lower priority.

My main goal for this afternoon is to work on my NPT story. I've found my pretext for bringing the characters into proximity, so I think I can move forward more quickly now.

I'm trying to decide whether or not to fight my way through a graphic novel I've got from the library. Most of the text is white on black which is very, very difficult for me to read. It tends to wobble on me, especially if the font is at all irregular. I've renewed the dratted thing three times and only opened it yesterday. It's not due until next week and can still be renewed, but... I only want to renew it if I'm sure I'll actually read it.
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Our nephew has graduated. There were more than four hundred kids in his class, so it took a long time for them all to cross the stage. As we were driving away after, I asked if anyone had seen a single student who wasn't white. Cordelia said she saw one and that she was glad she wasn't the only one who noticed.

The EMU Convocation Center was not a pleasant place. The seats were painfully small, and so were the rows. I could barely stand by the end. The pain levels were high. Also, everything was so very steep that I was surprised that nobody died. The backs of the seats for each row were about even with the floor of the row behind. I'm not normally afraid of heights, but I was scared to death that I would fall because I was not feeling particularly steady to begin with. Scott's parents had saved us seats in the middle of the row, so we had to squeeze past people to get there. The stairs (I have no idea if there was any seating accessible without stairs) had railings in some spots but also had gaps in the railing of two to three feet at a time which combined very badly with the steepness on the way down after the ceremony.

I was so exhausted that I almost didn't make it to our car. There wasn't any option for me to sit somewhere and wait for Scott to bring the car by, though. I ended up leaning pretty heavily on Scott, and he kept trying to find somewhere for me to wait. There just wasn't anywhere.

I took Ativan a couple of hours before the ceremony. I shudder to think how I'd have felt without it. I fiddled with my cell phone and leaned on Scott and Cordelia in turn in order to deal with the anxiety. I did a bit of holding onto Scott as tightly as I could, too.

My gastroenterology appointment was relatively quick, once the doctor was free to see me. She was a little more than half an hour behind, but all we needed to do was to check in that nothing major had changed and that the medications were still working. Then I made an appointment for June of 2018, and that was that. Scott was able to pick me up which was a relief. I wasn't entirely sure I'd make it up the hill if I took the bus home.

I spent a large chunk of today in bed. I had a migraine that took forever to go away, even with medication, and I've been sneezing a lot with both a runny nose and sinus pressure. I'm not having dinner tonight because we have nothing in the house that won't make me sick (well, nothing that could be prepared in the time we had), one way or the other. I'm not pleased about this. It's now past when I can safely eat anything beyond air popped popcorn (which we don't have) or vanilla ice cream (which I can't have when my allergies are this active).
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I think the end is in sight on weeding the email. I think I'll finish some time tomorrow. I hope so, anyway. We haven't tried to retrieve my music files yet, so I don't know how that will go.

There's a book sale at Cordelia's school today. I'm not sure if she remembered to take the money she intended to. I offered to go in during the hour and a half that the sale will be open after school, but she was against that idea.

Friday will be busy. Our nephew's graduation ceremony is that evening, and I have an doctor's appointment quite late in the day. I made that appointment a year ago, and changing it would mean not getting in for many, many months. I just hope that the appointment gets done at a reasonable time. It's at 3:30, and by noon, that clinic is generally an hour behind. I don't expect the appointment to take long once I actually see someone.

I napped this morning for about an hour. It would have been longer, but Scott called while I was deeply asleep to tell me that he was on his way home so that he could go to the doctor. He's got a pinched nerve, we think (pain, numbness, tingling, all at varying levels), and they told him Friday that, if it wasn't getting better, he needed to come in as soon as could be arranged. Yesterday, it got very bad in the afternoon/evening, and he figured out today that it wasn't that it was getting better so much as that the ibuprofen he had taken in the morning helped a lot.

I was both glad and sorry to be awoken. I was having anxiety dreams involving at least half a dozen different things that usually only occur one at a time in my dreams, but I was actually asleep and very desperately needed the sleep. Ah, well. Maybe I can nap tomorrow morning.
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I did a little writing last night, less than 300 words. I was just too tired to focus.

When I tried to call a cab for getting to my appointment yesterday, I discovered that the company's phone was out of service. I used it nine days ago for getting to UHS, so it's a very recent development. I was at a point in time when I really couldn't afford to call around to see if any of the other companies I found listed on Google actually still exist (at least one listing was for a company that I know absolutely doesn't), so I ran for the bus.

I got lucky in that the bus was only about half full. I'd expected it to be packed at that time of day (around 8:30 in the morning) because that bus links commuter lots to the university medical center/hospital and to central campus. Possibly the fact that the students are gone made the difference, but I'm used to every bus before 9:30 being standing room only and not letting anyone on for the last three stops before the hospital. (We're four or five stops back, a couple of miles away.)

The clinician I saw agreed that, if I feel worse and am not sleeping using the c-PAP, that it's not actually helping. She prescribed a different mask, just in case that will help. The main reason, if I understand correctly, is that this mask and headgear shift where the hose is so that it may not cause me so much anxiety. Otherwise, we're going to hold off until after I see my psychiatrist on the 20th. The hope is that she can prescribe something, other than Ativan, that I can take at night so that I sleep more deeply. I have no idea what that might be. Benadryl doesn't make me sleepy. Melatonin gives me headaches that last for days. Ambien is off the table entirely because of my genetics being a terrible match for it.

After the appointment was over, I wandered around the medical center a bit, doing Ingress. Then I took the bus downtown, doing more Ingress along the way. About ten minutes after I got off the bus, I reached level 10 in Ingress. I had been hoping to do that on my birthday, but I was so sick that day and the next that it wasn't even remotely an option.

After that, [personal profile] evalerie and I met at Jerusalem Garden for lunch. I got a chicken shwarma sandwich that proved spicier than I wanted to be. I also got fries which the menu said would have sumac on them, but the waitress told me, when she brought them, that they don't put sumac on any more, just a pre-mixed salt and pepper (including cayenne) blend. I wouldn't have ordered them at all if it hadn't been for the promise of sumac, so I was disappointed.

Cordelia ended up eating my leftovers, half the sandwich and a lot of fries, when she got home. She complained about the spice in the sandwich but ate it anyway.
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I have phone calls I need to make today, and I don't want to deal with them. I also desperately want a nap and know that, even if I lie down, I'm unlikely to sleep.

At least, my mother called me back (I left her a message last night). She and my step-father can't come to Cordelia's concert after all but do plan to come to 8th grade graduation. I had thought that 9 a.m. would be too early given the two hour drive, but Mom says that that's much easier than trying to drive home at night. Also, they have contractors working on urgent house repairs, and the contractors will only work if someone's at home.

One of my phone calls, I need to make around 3 p.m. as I'm calling a high school teacher, the choir director, to talk about choir camp this summer. The other call, I can make any time, but it's also not urgent urgent, so it's hard to make myself do it. That second call is to schedule a tune up for our air conditioner. I really hate to spend the money on it, but getting it done will keep the dratted thing running for longer.

We had a session of Scott's new Firefly game last night. I think I'm going to loathe the system because my preference is for rules that require no decisions on my part and that I don't have to think about or use very much. That's my preference when I'm GM, too. No matter what I'm running, I run rules lite. People who've done a lot of table top gaming tend to boggle when I say that GURPS is my preferred system but that I run rules lite. GURPS is the most flexible system I've seen for character creation/setting creation/genre bending. I'm just not prone to deal with the picky rules in play. I've got a general feel for what different dice rolls mean relative to the numbers on the character sheet, but I'm guided more by interesting story than by the dice. I don't ignore the dice altogether, but I can go a session without asking anybody to roll anything.

I think that what I want is a weird hybrid of GURPS, Amber Diceless, and some form of percentile system.

I have an appointment at the sleep disorders clinic tomorrow. They called me yesterday in response to my patient portal email. I'm not sure what they're going to be able to offer me. The main thing the woman I talked to thought was that I need anti-anxiety medication. Yeah, I do. I've only been trying to find something that works, long term, since 1987. The only things I've found that work are controlled substances, and I'm not willing to take those every night even if some doctor was fool enough to prescribe them that way.

I'm so frustrated by this health crap. I can get plenty of lectures about potential long term problems but no discussion that everything they tell me to do about those is killing me right at the current moment. When I'm drowning, I'm not going to worry about the risk of sepsis from splinters from the bits of wood currently keeping me afloat.

I'm kind of irritated with the lecture series I'm currently watching. The title of the series is 'The Other Side of History: Daily Life in the Ancient World.' Apparently, the only places that existed in the ancient world were Egypt, Rome, Greece, Britain, and certain other small bits of Europe. Eleven episodes out of forty eight focus on Greece. Six focus on Egypt, and one of those is on Hellenistic Egypt. Thirteen episodes focus on Rome and territories under Roman control. The date on the box is 2012.

Cordelia's friend with the concussion was back at school yesterday. She's still having some headache issues and is taking things very easy. I don't know if she'll be at the concert tonight or not. Her father is becoming a US citizen today (her mother did a few years ago, and both kids were born in the US), and that, naturally, is a higher priority for her limited energy than the concert.
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We went to Blue Nile for dinner on Saturday. As usual, we got the vegetarian meal for three. When we get the version with meat, we don't eat enough of it to justify the added cost. The vegetarian version is tasty, filling, and what we really want when we go there. There was live music which isn't really our thing but wasn't terrible. Service wasn't great. We ended up waiting for five to ten minutes at a time on three different occasions. There seemed to be plenty of waitstaff, and they were by no means full, so I really don't know what was going on.

I sent patient portal messages on Saturday to the oncology nurse I see to discuss my decision to stay off of Tamoxifen and to the sleep disorders clinic to ask what I should do about the c-PAP. I am almost entirely sure that the problem is not the headgear. I have issues with being worried that I'll break the hose, disconnect the hose, bend it so that air can't get through, etc. I also have issues with feeling like I'm trapped by the machine itself. Taking off and putting on the headgear feels as insurmountable as sitting in the middle of a row in a crowded theater and desperately wanting to escape. (I felt this yesterday while sitting at my SIL's house because I was stuck in a corner and couldn't get out without getting several people to move. It's very stressful even when there's no reason for me to need to get up at all.)

Feminine TMI )

We spent about five hours at Scott's sister's house yesterday. We left much later than planned because everything we tried to do kind of blew up in our faces. Cordelia's back went out rather abruptly Saturday evening, and she was still hurting a bit by Sunday morning. She doesn't seem to have done anything at all to cause it, either.
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Scott and I managed our errand at the bank yesterday (transferring Social Security money from Cordelia's account to ours) and picked up food at the Syrian place on the way home. I was a lot less hungry than I had thought I was, so I didn't eat all that much. I ended up napping off and on for most of the afternoon and evening. We're currently planning to go out for the birthday celebration today if I feel well enough.

Right now, I'm awake, but I've still got pretty bad cramps. I think I can manage with the cramps as long as I don't need to walk too far or for too long.

I managed to start my Not Prime Time story last night in spite of still having no ideas on the plot. I know the characters and starting situation, but there needs to be a goal/event of some sort because the characters aren't going to come together unless forced by circumstances. I don't know... Is there a random disasters generator somewhere online? I also need to find where I saved off the canonical timeline so that I can figure out what year it is in the story. Maybe there's something real world that I could use. Not a real disaster-- that would be tacky at best-- but some hint of something that could have been and wasn't.

And the chronology I've got doesn't cover the pertinent part of canon. There's a time skip between what it does cover and when I need to set this. I don't know how long that is. I don't think it can be less than two years, and it seems unlikely to be more than five, but I don't know.

I also wrote another 700 words on other things last night.

I was considering signing up for another fic exchange, but the deadline for that is some unspecified time today, and I keep looking at the options and realizing that what I would be likely to write and what I would like to read are both out of step with what other people seem to be interested in. Maybe I could write a treat or something if I have time and inspiration or do a pinch hit if I see one that's a good match.

I have a library book due tomorrow that can't be renewed. I haven't started it yet, so I rather suspect I'm not going to. Ah, well. I can put another hold on it. The waitlist only has one person on it, so I should get it fairly soon.
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It's very frustrating that Scott set aside a day for me because of my birthday and all I can do is lie down with a hot water bottle pressed to my belly. And that's after taking naproxen to deal with the cramps. I know my body needs this, but my last period was in October. Couldn't this have happened last week? Or next week?

I finally stopped sneezing and such around 11 this morning. The key when this happens is for me to dehydrate myself which kind of freaks out people who are trying to take care of me. Most of the time, drinking more water is good when I'm sick, but this particular thing won't stop until I dry out enough.

I slept badly last night. Part of that was the runny nose (I didn't even try to use the c-PAP), part of that was the cramps, and part of it was different parts of my body wanting different temperatures. My upper body was cold, but I had to keep moving my feet out from under the blankets and shifting around to find cool spots on the bed for them. Sadly, no cool spot ever last more than about four seconds.

I took a cab to my appointment yesterday and then took the bus home afterward. I probably should have either taken a cab home or waited for Scott to pick me up. I almost missed my stop due to just completely spacing out with exhaustion. I did a little bit of walking around and playing Ingress after my appointment. I'd probably have done a little more, but Cordelia's after school meeting got canceled, and she was worried about where I was.
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I was hoping to go into town a couple of hours before my appointment today and get lunch and walk around a bit, playing Ingress, but I don't think that's going to happen. I've been sneezing violently off and on. It's raining. Oh, and I have cramps. (On one level, a period would be a good thing, but I really don't want one, not ever again. Also, it would be very difficult for the timing to be worse.)

Cordelia's best friend is home with a concussion. A laptop fell on her head at school yesterday. My assumption is that she was getting one out of the lower rack on the cart while someone else pulled out and dropped one from the upper rack. I wouldn't expect that to be a fall of more than a couple of inches, though, so maybe not. It's just that she's a very tall girl. I can't think how else a laptop would be in a position to fall on her. Even if she was seated, no one would be likely to carry a laptop high enough to drop it on her. And Cordelia said 'fell on her' rather than that someone dropped it on her.

At any rate, Cordelia wants to do something for her friend but rejected every suggestion we made. I'm going to email the girl's mother to ask if there's anything she'd enjoy. If the mother suggests something, I think Cordelia will feel more comfortable with it than she does if we, her parents, suggest things.

Oh, I know! Every time Cordelia visits her friend wants her to bring a particular DVD. A copy of that would probably be a great gift.

Scott's mother called in the middle of my planned nap time yesterday morning. She was taking a walk while Scott's father was at rehab (for heart trouble) and wanted to chat with someone during it. She's very disappointed that my c-PAP isn't making me feel better. Hers apparently did, right away. I explained that, while I wear it, I sleep like Cordelia was six months old and sick and sleeping in the next room. As of tomorrow, it'll be three weeks since I got the dratted thing.

Scott's of the opinion that three weeks is long enough that I should have adjusted and that, since I haven't, I need to talk to someone at the sleep disorders clinic. I'm not sure what they'd have to offer. I don't think it's the specific gear so much as any gear at all. I sleep better when I take Ativan, but I really can't do that every night.

I wrote 1500 words last night but still haven't managed to start my NPT story. I realized after talking to a friend that I was focusing on the wrong character. That other character still needs to be featured prominently, but there's another character who, when I talk about my ideas, is more pivotal. Since that other character was also requested, shifting focus makes sense.
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Cordelia decided that she was close enough to done with her big project (all that's left is eight more illustrations) that we could celebrate last night after all, so we went to dinner at Saica. She tried something new. Actual raw fish sushi, a tray with a variety of different things. I got a bento and brought most of it home; that fed me and Cordelia for breakfast this morning.

Cordelia liked her presents. We mostly got her books. I watched her wishlist for months and jumped on books when good used copies came up. There were two Funko Pop figures, too. General Leia and Finn, if I recall correctly. She says that Baby Groot is still her favorite. She also thought that General Leia looks weird because of not having a mouth.

I'm still not sleeping well with the c-PAP. I'm waking more often. It used to be that I could sleep about six hours without needing the bathroom, but now it's a maximum of about three hours. At that point, I wake fully and won't get back to sleep unless I empty my bladder. I think that, on school nights, I'm getting about five hours of sleep. No wonder my legs ache and I'm starting to get headaches a lot.

Generally, by the time I'm ready to nap, it's lunch time, and then there's not enough time after lunch to actually sleep before Cordelia gets home. She doesn't like me napping when she's home and will come in to check on me every twenty minutes.

The lab test results from my ER trip were released to me today. I have no idea what most of the things tested for are, but I think there's at least one thing I want to ask my primary care doctor about when I see her next week. The chest x-ray showed a 'slightly elevated left hemidiaphragm,' and that's not something that's ever been mentioned on any previous chest x-ray. Dr Google gives scary information about that that I really think doesn't apply here because they wouldn't have let me leave the ER as casually as they did if they thought I had, say, an abdominal tumor.

I've turned on the air conditioner now. I need to schedule a tune up for the system. It was 85F in here when I checked the thermostat last night, and we try to keep it a bit cooler than that, especially since I'm still having problems with feeling overheated in spite of having stopped the Tamoxifen.
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Scott meant to wrap Cordelia's birthday presents last night while she was at an orientation meeting for one of her summer volunteer things, but it completely slipped both of our minds. I guess she'll have to deal with gift bags, because I really don't want to deal with how my hands will feel if I try to do the wrapping. Last night was the last chance for Scott to do anything before her birthday while she wasn't home.

She's asked to celebrate her birthday on Saturday instead of tomorrow because of a big school project that's due Friday. She's been asking me repeatedly what part of speech certain things are, and I answer and then second guess and triple guess. Is 'most' in 'most are red' a noun or a pronoun? If it was 'most apples are red,' it would be an adjective. Is it still one when the noun is implied? Is 'that' in 'this is the thing that we decided' a conjunction or a pronoun or something else entirely?

My Fandom5K recipient hasn't given me any sort of feedback on my fic. Those went public at midnight, Eastern, Saturday/Sunday, and my recipient didn't put a comment on the AFK post in the community, so I don't know what's up there.

I finished one library book yesterday, an actual novel aimed at adults, and got about a third of the way into a second one (which can't be renewed and is due Sunday). I stopped because I hit a point where I'm pretty sure something I don't want to watch is about to happen.

I've had three zits in the last two days, so I'm wondering if my body's gearing up for a period. I don't want one and haven't had one since early October. If I get one, it resets the clock on menopause and, of course, will just generally be a PITA. I turn 50 on the 26th, so it's sort of early for full on menopause (plus my hormone levels don't support me being there quite yet), but... It would be so nice not to have to deal with that again.

My to do list for today is to shower and to get the trash and recycling out. After that, I have things to read, watch, and write. I'd kind of like to nap, too. I had an awful time getting to sleep last night because I was kind of keyed up.
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My last PT appointment went well. Mainly, at this point, it's a question of me keeping up my exercises and being careful. Next week, the only medical appointment currently scheduled is Cordelia's PT, and that's at a time when Scott can take her without me going along. I just have to figure out a decent dinner option for her that she can eat in the car because PT ends at 6:00 and she has something else from 6:00 to 8:00.

Since Cordelia was off at Cedar Point all day, Scott and I went out for dinner at a nearby Chinese restaurant, Evergreen. We had eaten there once, right after we moved here a bit more than twenty years ago, and had not been impressed at all, but we thought it had likely changed. It had. The decor was completely different and so, I think, was the menu. We both liked what we got, but we were pretty conservative in terms of what we ordered-- Scott got chicken with green beans and ginger. I got shrimp with vegetables. I also tried their bubble tea. The tapioca pearls weren't the texture I prefer, but it was otherwise passable, just very, very heavy on the ice which made getting the tapioca pearls kind of challenging.

Cordelia ate the leftovers from both dishes for lunch and liked them. I was surprised by the one with ginger in it because she usually hates ginger. Of course, she's got a really nasty head cold, so maybe she couldn't taste it.

I got everything on yesterday's to do list done except for starting my Not Prime Time assignment. Hopefully, I can make a dent in that today. I also want to change our sheets. I think I can manage that if I wear thumb splints and am cautious.

We'll be getting together with Scott's family for Mother's Day tomorrow. For some weird reason, we're once again going to a particular Italian place where there's very little I can eat (I need to avoid oregano, basil, tomatoes, peppers, and black pepper and to limit oil/fat for reflux reasons) and where Scott's sister has had horrible service (as in forgetting to bring her meal out at all) more than once. The gluten free menu, which Scott's sister and mother both use, is extremely limited.

I don't know if Scott's sister's in-laws will be there or not. They might be, or they might be doing something earlier in the day. But if they are, maybe this is the only place they could find that could seat twelve people at 6:00 on Mother's Day? Without them, there would be nine of us which is still a pretty large group. I don't know.
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I tried to nap yesterday morning but didn't manage much in the way of actual sleep. This morning, I was able to sleep in because Cordelia spent the night at her best friend's house. Her friend's parents were willing to take on the task of getting the girls to the school in time for the 7 a.m. bus departure for Cedar Point.

Scott predicted the sleepover when he heard that Cordelia had walked over to her friend's house (with her friend). I think the walk took them about an hour because it is a fair distance, 2-3 miles. I had expected Cordelia to stay for dinner but not for a sleepover. Cordelia ended up texting me a list of things to pack for her. A few of those were really, really vague-- 'a book from my shelf that's not too heavy' for example. Scott ended up asking her about five or six different options before finding one she thought would work.

I caught the cold that Cordelia's had the last few days. Yesterday, I sneezed and had a runny nose. Today, I don't seem to be having problems, but it's hard to tell what will happen later today. I tossed and turned a lot last night due to the cold and didn't dare use the c-PAP because pushing crap into my lungs seems like a great way to make myself really sick. I don't have any options for dealing with asthma at this point, so I don't dare risk it.

My last PT appointment is today at 2:45. I don't want to go, but I will. I'll probably go a little early because some folks from the other Ingress faction took out all of the portals at the hospital. I could really use the AP for recapturing those.

My to do list for today isn't all that long:

PT
Grocery list
Shower
Start my NPT assignment
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The library finally checked in that CD that Scott returned on Friday. That's a relief. I was starting to wonder if our house was eating library CDs.

I tried to nap yesterday morning. I was in bed for several hours, but I don't think I actually slept until the last forty five minutes or so (and then I dreamed vividly). I tried the c-PAP through the first hour and a half, and again, it was saying that I was stopping breathing for more than ten seconds at a time over and over because the average per hour went up from 4.5 to 6.5. I'm supposed to try to stay under an average of 4.0 per hour.

Last night, I slept pretty soundly once I fell asleep, but I woke at 4:00 and didn't really sleep again after that. I've got two appointments at the hospital today, one at 10:30 and one at 2:00, so I'm not going to have the option of napping. I'm currently trying to decide whether or not we've got anything I can pack that will help me stay awake or if I should just hope that the cafeteria has something useful. I know there are a lot of options there, but I think they don't offer anything I can drink except water because they don't sell anything sweetened with sugar.

I wrote 860 words of something else that has nothing at all to do with any of the exchanges I'm doing or with any of my existing WIP. I mostly wrote it because it wouldn't leave me alone while I was trying to nap. I also added 400 words to one of my House of Sulfur and Mercury WIP. My word count for the year so far is a bit over 70000, so I'm definitely going to hit my word count goal for the year by the end of this month.

Cordelia has a cold and is very peeved about the fact. I'm almost certain to catch it from her, and Scott's pretty sure to catch it from me. I'm not looking forward to it. I was really hoping to avoid colds until after I'm used to the c-PAP.
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The c-PAP last night was not a success. I put the 'discomfort' levels on par with walking home from the bus stop on a broken foot and sprained ankle. My skin actually felt like it was burning where the nasal pillows touched. I'm going to clean them, assuming I can find anything safely unscented that's also mild enough, and try again tonight. The nasal pillows I used at the sleep clinic didn't burn, so I'm hoping this is something that can be cleaned off. The weight of the hose was also painful if I slept on my side facing the machine, and the headgear is, sadly, designed to put velcro on my cheeks. I think I can deal with that last by wrapping it. I'm not sure with what, but there must be something.

I kept the rig on for about two hours, possibly slightly more. The first hour, I couldn't possibly have slept even if things had been comfortable because Scott was playing videos on his laptop (while next to me in bed) and because lights were on in the living room.

I wanted to stay in bed longer than I ended up doing this morning, but my mother had said she might drive over today, so more sleep wasn't a good option. As it happens, she's not coming until tomorrow (or maybe not at all. The check engine light is on in her car, and she doesn't want to drive two hours each way without being sure that the car will make it).

The A-Ride folks say, in their canned message, that one is supposed to allow an hour and a half to get to one's destination. Half an hour for the pick up window and an hour for travel time. It's a shared ride service, so it's entirely possible to need to go far out of the way to pick up or drop off other passengers. I've done six rides in the last two or three weeks. Two of them ended up shared. Every one of them, the driver arrived either before my pick up time or right on the dot. Yesterday, I was at Medequip eleven minutes after my pick up and forty nine minutes before my appointment.

Fortunately, the guy I was supposed to see was free to see me early. I was done by the time my appointment would have started if they'd stuck to the schedule. They don't have an actually waiting area. They tell people to sit on the various recliners that they offer for sale. I eyed those and realized that only one of them was actually the right size for me to be able to put my feet on the floor while sitting. That's out of probably twenty different chairs. Being 5'2" isn't that weird.

I tried to do some editing yesterday and discovered that I was too cranky to deal with my beta reader's perfectly reasonable comments without shooting back sharp comments. So I sent an apology and closed the documents.

Scott went out and picked up the library holds last night. I had one that was set to expire today, and we weren't sure there'd be time to get down there today if my mother visited. We'll still need to stop by there tomorrow, but even if Mom does visit, Sunday will be less filled with things that Scott has to do. Getting holds yesterday means dealing with two DVDs that can't be renewed. I suggested we try to get through them both today so that we don't have to take them back mid-week.

PT is claiming I was a no show on Thursday even though I called. They aren't open today, so I can't call and complain about that. I did call. I did leave a message. My cell phone shows I was on the phone with their number for a minute and a half at 6:30 a.m. on Thursday. I wouldn't argue if they said I didn't give them twenty four hours notice, but I was not a no show.

The chest pain is less than it was. Breathing is almost never hurting now, and that was the most worrying bit.

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