I've come to the conclusion that most parenting in general, and potty-training in particular, is one of those things that everyone has to forge their own path on--personalities of both parents and child, daily life situations, outside influences, etc. all being too variable to say, "Do X!"
I think advice is only meant to be given as anecdotal "Well, here's what we did. It may turn out this will work for you." And that's the spirit in which I offer my so-called advice...
Basically, we didn't manage to toilet train my stepdaughter until she was 3 and a half, which I felt was abysmally late given that I was sick to death of the potty-training dance. It wasn't even the diapers, it was just the "will she? won't she? can we just get it over with? WHAT THE HELL?" She didn't really want to wear diapers, it wasn't a physical control issue, and yet. We couldn't get there.
What worked for us was going on vacation. Something about the change in venue, combined with Nana's attention (we were off at the cottage with Dann's parents) plus Dad's attention and a totally different, more relaxed routine for a week worked the magic. I know it's not going to work that way for you, but maybe there's some small nugget of info in there that will help.
I think the deadline is going to work wonders, btw. She's probably looking forward to it at this point. As far as I can tell, you'll never know what will actually get the kid to buy in to the whole thing. One friend wasn't trained until four and a half, when his parents said, "Well, you can't go to kindergarten unless you can use the potty." He wanted to go to school more than anything. For me, it was the deal of not wearing diapers anymore--I apparently hated them so much that when I made the mental link, I was trained overnight at age two and a half. If nothing so far has tempted Delia, you're on the right track with building anticipation. And it sounds like you have the food thing under control--which is to say, you're not trying to control it. Brava.
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Date: 2007-03-26 10:12 pm (UTC)I think advice is only meant to be given as anecdotal "Well, here's what we did. It may turn out this will work for you." And that's the spirit in which I offer my so-called advice...
Basically, we didn't manage to toilet train my stepdaughter until she was 3 and a half, which I felt was abysmally late given that I was sick to death of the potty-training dance. It wasn't even the diapers, it was just the "will she? won't she? can we just get it over with? WHAT THE HELL?" She didn't really want to wear diapers, it wasn't a physical control issue, and yet. We couldn't get there.
What worked for us was going on vacation. Something about the change in venue, combined with Nana's attention (we were off at the cottage with Dann's parents) plus Dad's attention and a totally different, more relaxed routine for a week worked the magic. I know it's not going to work that way for you, but maybe there's some small nugget of info in there that will help.
I think the deadline is going to work wonders, btw. She's probably looking forward to it at this point. As far as I can tell, you'll never know what will actually get the kid to buy in to the whole thing. One friend wasn't trained until four and a half, when his parents said, "Well, you can't go to kindergarten unless you can use the potty." He wanted to go to school more than anything. For me, it was the deal of not wearing diapers anymore--I apparently hated them so much that when I made the mental link, I was trained overnight at age two and a half. If nothing so far has tempted Delia, you're on the right track with building anticipation. And it sounds like you have the food thing under control--which is to say, you're not trying to control it. Brava.