the_rck: (Default)
I ended up not going to Kroger yesterday. I just couldn't spend that long out of the house when Scott was still too sick to be able to refill his water bottle without wiping himself out. (Cordelia wasn't home until almost 5:00). I thought I'd go this morning, right after walking Cordelia to the cross walk (if you can call it that when she generally walks about twenty feet ahead of me and doesn't acknowledge I'm there. It's just that she finds the idea of me not doing it completely unacceptable), but it's pouring rain.

I'm hoping that the rain will let up a little later on. I absolutely have to get the prescription today because I've taken the last tablet and need another some time between 11 a.m. and 2 p.m. I just don't want to deal with wet feet from standing in the rain. In a little bit, I'll dig up some dry socks and see if one of my other pairs of shoes is closer to waterproof. My boots are, but I'd feel silly wearing those with shorts.

I'm also trying to figure out what to get in addition to my prescriptions. The things we actually need are mostly kind of heavy-- honey, chicken noodle soup, lemon juice-- which makes things more challenging. Maybe my backpack? But I also need to get bread, and I don't want that to get smashed.

Maybe cleaning the bread machine and setting something up there is a better option? I'm not sure if our bread flour is still good, though; I'll see how it smells.

My back was so tense and painful last night that I did end up lying on the floor. It helped those muscle spasms a lot but hurt in other ways because the floor is hard. I just think I'm going to have to do that a time or three every day. Usually, I'd try having a little alcohol (like a wine cooler amount) for this, but I'm taking Tylenol for the elbow pain, so alcohol is absolutely out.

I've promised Cordelia that I will finish my current Netflix DVD today so that I can send hers back in the same envelope. She's been waiting a couple of weeks for me to finish, so I really, really have to do it.

Because I really needed another WIP, I started a new story yesterday. I wrote about a thousand words, and I'm hoping to keep it under three thousand. It's another Weiss Kreuz story, so if I finish it in time, I can use it for [community profile] weissvsaiyuki. I started from one of the posted prompts, but I don't know that the story actually fits it now. I just have to figure out what the story's actually about.
the_rck: (Default)
I had no luck at all with napping yesterday. I think I'm just too stressed out to manage it. I tried for long enough that I ended up feeling fairly dehydrated. We were all in bed by 9:30 last night, and I feel a lot better this morning than I did yesterday, so I really think that getting to bed earlier is key.

Scott's cold is bad enough that he called in sick even though he'll get into trouble for it. He was having trouble doing anything at all last night and went straight back to bed after making the phone call. He's got a nasty cough. So far as I can tell, he doesn't have a fever, but he thought he might because of how he felt.

I'm going to have to haul myself outside later on today to go and pick up a prescription that's waiting. I have enough of the medication to last me through breakfast tomorrow, but I'll need the new bottle by noon. Wellbutrin is not something I'm enthusiastic about missing doses of. I don't think it's doing anything useful for me (apart from serving to demonstrate that Look! I am trying to do something about my anxiety! Honest!), but it's a bad thing to stop cold turkey.

I suppose I could get the dratted thing tomorrow morning instead, but this way, I can pick up some bread so that I can make Scott a sandwich for work tomorrow (all the bread was moldy yesterday, but he felt too terrible to pick up more). I can also see what cold medicines we have and what we need. I think we're out of most of the things Scott would normally take.

Maybe I can motivate myself to go with a promise of lunch out and/or a stop at that park halfway there that has Ingress portals I've never hacked. It would have been pretty easy to go straight from dropping Cordelia at the crosswalk, but it's hours yet before the pharmacy opens. I'm not sure much out that way is open yet, either. Possibly the two coffee places? There's a bakery, too, but it doesn't have anywhere for people to sit down and eat what they've bought.

I think I've finished one of my Weiss Kreuz stories for [community profile] weissvsaiyuki. It still needs tweaking in the details, and I think the ending's not paced properly, but it has an ending now. The one that's the next most likely to be possible to finish is sitting at a story pivot point. I don't quite like any of the paths I could take it down. Well, rather, I don't think any of them is more right or more appealing or easier or... anything that would make the decision more than a roll of a die. It's also kind of close in the through line (so far) to another story I wrote recently. The other two WIP that might work for the challenge are complicated and likely to be very, very long. One is at 6K words and probably needs 12K to 15K to find an ending (though I've been wrong before. In both directions). The other is at 4.5K and probably needs to be at least 30K.
the_rck: (Default)
Stuff about Scott and possible depression )

The furnace repair we had scheduled for today has been put off due to the technician being out sick. I'm trying to decide what to do with my morning now. I've made one phone call and am waiting for it to be returned. I need to make one more phone call and have two others that I should make but that aren't nearly as urgent.

I'm also really, really tired, and I want to take a walk, and I want to write.

I think I need to make that other call and then lie down.
the_rck: (Default)
My body's being obnoxious on the menstrual front, and I really want to sleep. It's Thursday, though, so I have a lot to do before the cleaning lady comes two hours from now. I did try to nap for about three hours, but the phone rang twice, and I had to get up twice to pee, and Scott was not quiet at all while he showered. When I realized that it had been three hours, I got up to get going on the things I need to do. I have two loads of laundry to wash, and I need to run the dishwasher. I need to find a few bits of paperwork and then deal with them.

I think that September's word count is going to be the low for so far this year. It was about 4700 the last time I checked, and I haven't written since then. If I can get myself writing again in the next couple of weeks, I'll be much more likely to sign up for Yuletide. If I can't, it's probably a sign that I'd not be able to handle an assignment.

Some time yesterday, I lost the Ingress portal that I'd held for 128 days. I got a badge a 90 days and was hoping to get the last badge at 150 days. The Guardian badge is almost 100% luck, though. All you can do is to keep recharging things and hope that no one comes by to knock them over. Really active and/or passionate players tend to have more trouble keeping a Guardian portal because equally passionate folks on the other side will seek out potential Guardian portals for those people just to take them out. I didn't expect to keep this particular portal as long as I ended up doing because it was one that I dropped a single resonator on as we drove by on our way through a town I'd never been in before. Things reachable from a car driving by don't last.

I have two portals at about 45 days each which might, in theory at least, get to the 150 day mark. I shan't hold my breath on them, either, but I'll keep recharging them as long as they're mine.

I would like to go and wander around North Campus, playing Ingress, some morning while the weather's cool enough that I can bear it but not yet so cold that my lungs can't handle it. I could catch a bus that way after dropping Cordelia off in the morning, but I worry about getting there and suddenly really needing a bathroom. The university has a couple of libraries there, but I'm not sure of their hours or of whether they require showing ID to get in. I suppose that's something I should be able to research. It just would suck to be 45 minutes from a bathroom and need one desperately.

From a certain point of view, the best time for me to go and do things is in the very early morning when I'm out of the house anyway. That means I don't have to work myself up to leaving home again. Stepping out the door at all is generally the hardest part. Temperature wise, it tends to be better then or a couple of hours after dark (and the buses aren't very useful that late). But, some days, some time between 8 a.m. and 10:30 a.m., I spend 45 minutes to an hour really needing to have access to a bathroom.

I saw my psychiatrist on Tuesday. She gave me a prescription for more Halcion and suggested that I try taking two tablets at some point so that I know whether or not that's an option if I'm stressed out enough that one tablet doesn't help me at all. I will probably try that Saturday night because Scott will be home that night and I won't need to be up at any particular time on Sunday. He'll be working Friday night, so that's not an option. He won't work Sunday night, but I have to be up at 5 on Monday morning.
the_rck: (Default)
I've been steadily chipping away at my to-do list since Scott went to bed this morning. I think today's my best bet for dealing with phone calls and forms. Scott said that, since he'll be home during business hours this week, I could pass him a list of calls, too.

I've got about two hours before Cordelia gets home, and I'm trying to figure out my priorities. I have to find another black pen so that I can finish filling out the Aetna claim forms (I knocked my last one under the loveseat and am not quite desperate enough to try to move that to retrieve it). I have a non-urgent email and a non-urgent phone call. There is an urgent-ish call on Scott's list, and I maybe ought to make that one as it needs doing while Cordelia's not home.

Of course, what I really want to do is nap. I may just give up and do that.

I did a little bit of writing last night and realized why I haven't gotten much done recently. Cordelia's been glued to my side for considerable periods and turning up for that more or less at random during the time she's home. She reads whatever's showing on my laptop and rather disapproves of me writing fanfic because I'm old. She especially disapproves of me writing anything even vaguely sexual.

Scott and I drove into town this morning to return a book to Community. Cordelia claims she told me to take it back on Friday when I went in to withdraw her, but I don't remember that at all. At any rate, it took about ten minutes this morning, so it wasn't a big deal.

I need to talk to folks at Skyline about letting Cordelia sign herself in and out with me either calling or writing a note to authorize it. If she can do that, it would make appointments during school hours infinitely more possible from my side of things.

I discovered today that, while I can shut down the ringing of our landline phones, I can't shut down the ringing from the base unit/charger. I'm not sure what the point is of being able to mute ringing on the mobile bit if the base is just going to howl. The problem is that we have a phone in our bedroom, so Scott was awakened by a junk call around 10:00 this morning. We only have a landline at this point because it was cheaper to get cable and phone with the internet than to get the internet connection on its own. The 'landline' isn't exactly a landline, either, and stops working when we lose power, so it doesn't even give us that.
the_rck: (Default)
I nominated for Yuletide last night. I ran into a problem of wanting to nominate something I don't own that's relatively recent. I couldn't remember the names of the characters I wanted to nominate, and I didn't want to nominate just the two I could find named online. There's a copy on the shelf at one of the library branches (not the one we'll go to to pick up our holds), but getting there would be more than I want to ask of Scott today. He drove Cordelia and her friends to a movie and has now taken her out for groceries. We need to visit the downtown library in the next three and a half hours. I think the lawn needs mowing pretty desperately, too. I've washed Scott's work clothes. The dishwasher is running. I showered and took care of the essential phone call I was waiting for. I'd like to wash a load of regular laundry by the end of the day.

At any rate-- Yuletide nominations: LEGO Star Wars: The Freemaker Adventures, Baba Yaga's Assistant, and (a request from Scott) Kerbal Space Program. I just don't have the energy at the moment to want anything strongly so I was looking for things that just might be good springboards for fic as opposed to being things I pine for. The Freemaker Adventures are silly enough to be fun but have enough plot and characterization to hang interesting stories from. Baba Yaga's Assistant is a short graphic novel aimed at kids. I think that exploring an ordinary(ish) teenager working for Baba Yaga would be fascinating. I thought about The Time Museum, but that's the one I'd have to either buy or get from the library in order to get the character names. I thought about Ursula Vernon's Hamster Princess books, but I didn't want those enough to get up and go to the bedroom to check the character names, so I just asked Scott if there was a small fandom he'd like fic for. He asked for Kerbal and gave me some character names. I'm not against fic for Kerbal. It could be fun. I think I've got enough sense of the game from Scott playing it to understand a fic. I don't know that I'd try to write one, but there are sure to be a lot of things nominated that I can write.

My nominations haven't been reviewed yet, so I could still change my mind, but I doubt I will. I'm too creatively exhausted for it. The fact that I don't have any writing deadlines now is a huge relief.

I still don't have a giftfic for Captive Audience, and waiting for that is delaying the archive opening. The announcement said that they're just waiting for one fic, and I don't have one, so... I feel bad about it but am not really prepared to say that it doesn't matter and to go ahead and open things. I feel like I should say that, though, and not be a bother. They're now saying Monday at midnight for the opening, so forty eight hours late.

I took a full tablet (0.25 mg) of Halcion last night and don't feel groggy today. I fear that that's because I got a bit more than eight hours of sleep rather than because it making me groggy on Friday was a fluke. I'm pretty sure that I'm not going to be able to get eight hours on a school night because Cordelia and Scott aren't respecting my need to. I'm not sure how much clearer I can make it to Scott. Cordelia... Well, she's actually needing me, so that's harder.

Cordelia's best friend visited yesterday and stayed until about 10 p.m. Both girls really seemed to enjoy the chance to spend time together. They're at different schools now. The other girl's family is still hoping to buy a house and move out of student family housing (the mother graduated three or four years ago but still works at the U. There's very little demand for those apartments now, so they've been allowed to stay). The last I heard, they were hoping for a place within walking distance of us. I think they'd still want their daughter at her current high school, but visiting would be so much easier. Right now, it takes about half an hour of bus riding with a transfer or two and is a much longer walk.
the_rck: (Default)
I walked in a different direction after parting from Cordelia at the crosswalk today. There are only half as many portals along the route I took, but I can do all of them from the sidewalk rather than tramping through dew soaked grass. Also, I wanted to place some resonators and, if I could, some mods. Only one of the portals had mod spots open, so I didn't get much out of it in that direction. I need to place 38 more mods to get my silver badge.

We had people over for Scott's Firefly RPG last night. I wasn't able to play for various reasons.

Cordelia and I almost got through the fourth Buffy episode today. We watched all of the third and then had to leave before the final fight in the fourth.

I have two things I really want to do today that I think shouldn't take long. Except that I'm still dithering about what scenario to do for UCon. Part of me still thinks that I can just show up, hand out characters, and make stuff up as I go. That's not how one shot games work. I need to have a general shape in mind for the story, with ideas for different paths to an ending. The players are pretty certain not to take any of the paths I expect, but having those in mind means having some things already in motion that I can toss at the player characters.

Scott ordered some books that he wanted sent to our six year old niece in Seattle. They ended up here, and sending them back to Amazon for reshipping costs more than half the value of the books (they're paperback early reader chapter books-- Magic Kitten series). This means a trip to the post office some time soon. I have some other things I'd like to mail at the same time, so that will work well.

I think it's actually sort of a pity that this book doesn't contain instructions for how to make the items it contains pictures of. It's a book of wearable fiber crafts photos. I'm not convinced I'd want to wear any of the things in the blog post talking about the book, but they're kind of fascinating to look at. The book's from 1976, but the blog post is current (the blog focuses on looking at old library books that don't belong in the collections where they were found).
the_rck: (Default)
I only managed about four and a half hours with the c-PAP last night. At that point, I started sneezing and just couldn't keep the nasal pillows in place.

Yesterday, Cordelia and I got our hair trimmed. I had to shower after because they sprayed my hair with something scented to get it wet, and that stuff dried sticky and made my nose itch. The hair place is a couple of doors down from a Starbucks, so we all got something there. Then we went to Target to get a couple of things Cordelia needs for camp. We ended up buying a bunch of DVDs, too. Some things Cordelia wanted desperately, a copy of Moana for me, and several things that were about $5 each and seemed worth that much.

I'm kind of puzzled as to why I can watch and enjoy Moana when most things involving sea/ocean travel set off my anxiety incredibly strongly due to my phobia of deep water. Maybe it's because the ocean seems self aware and more or less friendly?

We picked up food at Zoup on the way home. I like their food, but there's a problem in that I probably ought to switch to a different soup than my fallback but can't find any other options that I can eat safely. Avoiding tomatoes and peppers and anything heavily creamy makes that really hard. I got a side soup and a half sized salad. Scott got a side soup and a half sandwich. Cordelia got a sandwich.

I discovered, after we got home, that our current loaf of bread had started to grow mold, so Scott will have to go out and get a replacement today. He wants to go to the Games Library Day which starts soon, but there are several things I need him to do first. We have to go to the library. I need him to bring up a box or three from the basement for me to sort. He has to put up a cloths line outside so that we can put anti-tick spray on Cordelia's camp clothing. That goes on wet and is supposed to air dry outside. I really want to get as much sprayed today as we can.
the_rck: (Default)
I got about seven hours of sleep last night, all with the c-PAP. I'm noticing that I sleep more lightly during the second half of the night when I use the c-PAP all night. My guess is that the Ativan is wearing off and that I'm still not quite beyond the anxiety freak out stage of wearing the gear. I'm very, very tired today. I feel like I shouldn't be because I did sleep, but I really am.

Cordelia had an appointment at 9:45 this morning. I tried to get it earlier so that Scott would be home and in bed earlier, but the doctor simply wasn't available. Still, that's early enough that a lot of parking structures downtown (where the appointment was) limit parking severely to discourage commuters.

I've got one call I must make today and a second that I really should make today. I don't want to deal with either, and being tired makes it all that much harder. As a way of indicating how much I don't want to make the calls, I've been filling out forms in preference.

Cordelia needs to be in bed earlyish tonight because she has a volunteer shift at the downtown library at 9 a.m. Scott will likely be able to drive her in before he goes to bed, but I'd like her to take the bus if she can so that he doesn't have to stay up an extra hour.

My step-father is scheduled for his eye procedure at 1:30 tomorrow afternoon. Mom suggested we all (except Scott) get lunch beforehand. Since Cordelia's volunteer shift will end at 11:00, I suspect that we'll end up meeting her downtown right about then. I need to come up with a list of options because just wandering around to find something that looks good would use up our time rapidly. There are so very many restaurants in that general area, three or four a block.

My hands and my left elbow are still giving me a lot of trouble. I'm not sure what to do about it. I need to use them, but anything heavier than my cell phone is bad for my hands, and moving the elbow hurts even when my hand is empty, enough so that I'm thinking of digging out a sling to see if that helps.
the_rck: (Default)
My sleep was only middling last night. I was stressed out at bedtime and didn't end up turning out the light until much later than usual because I wanted to unwind a bit. I used the c-PAP for part of the night. It had been my intention to use it all night, but I took it off in the middle of the night. I don't know why. I remember doing it and that it seemed important to do so, but I can't remember why.

I decided to make use of being up early to do a chore that I've been putting off for months. I pulled all of the books I've already read off the shelves in bedroom (two shopping bags filled to the top) and consolidated the other books as much as I could. I've dusted some of the shelves. I don't know that the dust quite made it to the dust bunny stage, but I at least had dust mice.

I want to clear enough space that I can have one shelf for library books. Having them in six different places isn't conducive to remembering to read them. I also want space for my thumb splints and some place level to land my laptop over night when I've been using it in there before bed.

I need to figure out what to do with the jigsaw puzzles. I like puzzles, but we don't really have a place for me to do them. Setting up a card table isn't really feasible for space reasons, not unless I'm going to finish the puzzle in a single afternoon while I'm home alone.

Scott scheduled today as a vacation day so that he could deal with two medical appointments. The way work schedules things, that means he has tonight off. Their book keeping considers third shift to be on the day that it starts rather than on the day it ends. This is partly so they can say that third shift works M-F instead of Tu-Sa. At any rate, his first appointment is at 11 and the second at either 2 or 3. Right now, the plan is for him to shower and then try to nap for an hour before the first appointment.

We need to wash Scott's work clothes today, and I'd like to change the sheets and run a load of laundry for us and maybe for Cordelia. I need to shower, too, and I'd like to nap if I can. Oh, and it's trash day. Great fun.

Tomorrow, my parents will be in town briefly because my step-father has an appointment about that growth in his eye. They suggested that we go to lunch. I'm pretty sure that they were hoping to see Cordelia, but they never did much to build a relationship with her, so she's got zero interest. She'd go along if she had nothing else going on, but she's not going to skip part of her volunteering in order to see them.

Scott gave me a ride to and from my appointment yesterday. I wouldn't have asked, but I was feeling really miserable due to cramping. He took the opportunity to pick up an interlibrary loan book that had come in for Cordelia.

My psychiatrist suggested that I try to find some sort of online, at home work to earn money to help while we're financially strapped. I'm looking at that as a huge can of worms. There's not a lot I'm able to do because of not being able to commit to regular hours or even to a set number in a week. Also, most of the online work options aren't things I'd be good at or aren't things that my anxiety would permit.

I'm also concerned about the possibility that earning money, even sporadically, might affect my disability status with either Social Security or my long term disability insurance through my former employer. The LTD insurer is always looking for any hint that I might not be disabled. I might be able to work for a while before I wrecked myself, and that might well be long enough to lose the LTD insurance payments and the medical insurance that goes along with the money.

My writing might be marketable, but I think that would wreck me, too, because there'd need to be a lot of it, and I'd need to figure out how to sell it and work at making sure that people saw it and... I'd stay awake all night worrying that I had or hadn't done something that would just wreck everything. Also, the sort of writing that might bring in money within any sort of helpful time frame would likely be some sort of ebook porn short stories. I can write porn. Sometimes. I can even write it quickly. Sometimes. I just... I write dark and complicated, and sometimes, I can't write at all for days or even weeks.

My psychiatrist also said that, if I'm still exhausted the next time I see her, we can talk about stimulants because insurers will cover them for people with sleep apnea who have been using a c-PAP for at least two months. I'm not entirely optimistic. Provigil (modafinil) didn't help me at all, and I suspect that caffeine has more of a psychological effect for me than a physiological one. Well, if I've recently had caffeine, sleeping is harder because I have to get up to pee every twenty minutes, but I'm not sure that counts.

It's frustrating that she's the only medical professional I'm dealing with who understands that the things that the other doctors are worried about all derive at least in part from fatigue/exhaustion and from anxiety and pain making sleep difficult. And each of those things makes all of the others worse.

I did some edits on my second Pod Together fic yesterday, all things that my partner requested. I'm hoping that the changed text will be easier to read. I still need to do one check on the pronunciation of the name of a minor character. I think I remember how it was pronounced, but I don't want to rely on that.

I also wrote about four hundred words on chapter 7 of Auguries of Innocence. I need to go back to the early part of the chapter to lay some groundwork for the things that just occurred to me as necessary. It's all about a character who hasn't been in any of the previous chapters, so I don't need to tweak anything earlier in the story. (This is an advantage of using point of view characters who don't think the way that most people do, Draco because he's unmoored in time, and Luna because she never did.)
the_rck: (Default)
I keep losing track of what day of the week it is, and, probably because of the story that needs to get done, I have the constant feeling that I'm forgetting something important that I need to get done right this second. I actually don't have anything at all scheduled for the rest of the week, so I'm not actually forgetting an appointment or anything.

We discovered last night at about 9 that we have no bread type stuff usable for Scott's sandwiches. The rye bread was moldy. The burger buns were moldy. The two remaining bagels weren't, but for some reason, Scott didn't want cheese and turkey and chocolate. I suggested cashew butter and jam, but he decided to take meatloaf instead.

The meatloaf isn't exactly right this time. It's edible, but I put in too much teriyaki sauce because I lost control while pouring it in. I had to add a lot of extra oatmeal to balance the wetness, but there wasn't much I could do about the flavor. For some reason that I can't recall now, I also added dill. The combination of dill and teriyaki isn't bad, but it is completely unexpected and so a little disconcerting.

We still have half of the package of ground turkey left, and I should cook that today. I'm just not sure what I want to do with it. Maybe I can scrounge the ingredients to make some sort of soup either in the pressure cooker or in the crock pot? I know how to do it in the crock pot but that would require getting the dratted thing out and finding a place for it to sit and all of that. I think I'll see if there are any decent soup recipes for the pressure cooker.

There's going to be a local to us anomaly for Ingress in late August. I'm in the process of signing up for it, but I'm not sure how much I'll be able to do, given how variable my energy levels and such tend to be.

On the bright side, I'm no longer sore from yesterday's excursion. I had trouble walking for most of the evening, but I'm doing about as usual now. Which means I still hurt. I just don't hurt extra from having been stupid.

I currently only have two library books that can't be renewed. One is due this weekend. The other is newly checked out, so I have a couple of days shy of four weeks to finish it.

Today's To Do List )
the_rck: (Default)
I got a lovely fic for Not Prime Time. It's a 3500 word episode tag for The Pretender and has Jarod and Miss Parker as together and as thoroughly separated as they get. The characterization is excellent. Set Us Free. I haven't tried anything else in the archive yet.

The archive hasn't been open long enough for anyone to have looked at the two stories I wrote yet. One of them is so obviously me that I think even people who know me but haven't read my fic would guess. The other is a treat in a fandom I haven't ever written before, for a prompt that kind of grabbed me hard. It's got my stylistic fingerprints all over it, but I think it's less obviously mine.

I ended up sending Scott and Cordelia off to the dentist without me yesterday. I didn't actually need to be there, and if I stayed home, I could cook dinner. If I'd gone with them, it would have been after six when I started trying to figure out dinner. As it was, I had time to make turkey meatloaf in the instant pot. I used teriyaki sauce for the liquid, so I'm not sure if Cordelia will eat it, but Scott and I will enjoy it. I browned the other half of the package of ground turkey and added Alfredo sauce as something Cordelia would eat (Scott bought two 48 oz packages of ground turkey last time he went shopping. I need to either cook the other or freeze it. It's just hard to freeze it when I know that, while it will take hours to freeze, it will take days to thaw in the fridge). We had dinner early enough in the evening that I gambled on the Alfredo sauce and didn't end up having any reflux issues from it.

I had a deep throat tickle for most of last night that made sleeping nearly impossible and using the c-PAP actually impossible because the air running over that bit of my throat made me cough constantly. The whole thing turned to sneezing and runny nose around the time Scott needed to get up. Well, about twenty five minutes before that so that he got woken early and was quite cranky about it (not at me but in general). Things cleared up, and I slept for about five hours after Scott got up. I'd likely have slept longer, but my bladder wasn't having that.

I made a little progress on my first [community profile] pod_together story last night. I need to make some decisions about where I'm trying to go. I think that I'm hesitating because the option that will let me tie things up in under 10000 words interests me less than the various options that would create a considerably longer story. I also started yet another completely unrelated story that I can probably finish quickly but that I ought not spend time on until I have at least one of my [community profile] pod_together stories done. Still, I can likely canon review for it while writing my assignments.

Assuming I can figure out how to work the AppleTV remote. I loathe that thing. Who looked at remotes and said, "What we need is a remote that will turn the TV on if you sit on it or touch the top half of it when you pick it up to move it so that you don't sit on it"? It's a tiny thing, too, about the size of a smallish candy bar and very thin so that it can vanish easily into the depths of the couch.

The main chores for today are getting the trash and recycling to the curb. All told, that should take about fifteen minutes once I get myself to start. It will take longer if I make Cordelia help, but I probably should anyway. I keep doing the bit of putting away dishes from the dishwasher that she's responsible for because I need the silverware basket to be in the rack before I put dishes in around its space. Otherwise, I'd never be able to get the basket in without taking everything else out.
the_rck: (Default)
I'm routinely using my c-PAP at night from when I turn out the light until when Scott's alarm goes off. I keep intending to put the dratted thing back on after Scott gets up (we cuddle for a while after I've taken my thyroid medication), but I always fall asleep first or realize that I'm not going to sleep any more at all. Still, this is about five hours of c-PAP use, and they told me I should aim for a minimum of four hours a night. Scott's alarm goes off right around the time the Ativan wears off, so I don't know if putting the c-PAP rig back on would be something I could handle or if it would mean no more sleep.

I can function on five hours a night for a little while, and I'll pretty much have to when Cordelia starts school in the fall. I will have time for napping later in the day, but I don't know if I'll be able to make use of it. I couldn't this last spring.

I started looking at the bus company website today to try to figure out getting to Skyline. It looks like, if all the transfers and such go exactly right, the trip is roughly fifty minutes. There are two options for getting there, but one of them requires a twenty minute walk between the nearest stop and the school. I'm kind of confused by the route of the bus that actually stops near the school (five minute walk) because some things seem to indicate that one can catch it at the downtown station but other things indicate that one has to catch it three blocks away from the station.

My best guess is that there's something seriously broken in the current route planner when one says one wants to start at the transit center-- I kept having it, regardless of my destination, tell me that, in order to catch a bus there, I had to catch a bus from about three blocks away and take it to the transit center in order to transfer. I can only respond with a resounding ???? If I'm already at Blake, why would I walk down to Packard to catch a bus to take me back to Blake?

Scott and Cordelia both really enjoyed the Spider-man movie. Cordelia apparently asked Scott, as they left the theater, if we'll be buying the movie as soon as it comes out. He said we would.

I managed to write a bit of the Labyrinth story yesterday, maybe three hundred words, but it's all tedious, so I will probably chop it out. I think I might be starting at the wrong point for the chapter. Maybe I can use bits of it as tiny flashbacks? The first two paragraphs contain information that has to be in the chapter for it to make sense, but they're at a different point in time from the rest of the chapter, and transitioning is not working. There's one sentence near the end of what I wrote that I also want to keep, but I think that will fit pretty easily into stuff set later: "Lies were almost as dangerous as thoughtless wishes."

I spent most of my potential writing time yesterday doing things like making mashed potatoes and doing laundry and taking out the trash and so on. Today, I need to put away the laundry and change our sheets, but neither of those will take more than ten minutes, so I can't use them as an excuse not to write.

Oh, and I should fill out some insurance paperwork so that I can mail it tomorrow. I should also email Cordelia's doctor to ask if she can provide us with something written and official about Cordelia's knee for the high school or if we have to go back to the sports medicine clinic. I'd much, much rather deal with the pediatrician because there's a substantial difference in the copay between seeing her and seeing a specialist.

I'm probably going to tweak my offers for [personal profile] captiveaudience. There are things I offered that nobody's requested yet or for which there are requests I'm not convinced I could write well and things I didn't offer but could write if I match some specific requests. There's still almost a week left of sign ups, so I will likely wait a few days to see what happens in that direction.

I'm almost at 110000 words for the year to date. I'm really boggled by that.
the_rck: (Default)
We ended up at Palm Palace for dinner last night. The food and service were good, but even though I was conservative about what I ate, I ended up not feeling well due to a combination of gas and reflux. I think that the reflux was partly due to the gas and such, possibly even mainly due to it.

I slept badly last night. I never used the c-PAP at all because it seemed unwise with reflux and with me getting up repeatedly during the first couple of hours. I woke up with the sneezing and runny nose again, so apparently the c-PAP doesn't relate to that. Damned if I have any clue what's going on.

I guess I'll keep the extra appointment I have with my doctor next month (I was supposed to cancel it in favor of the scheduled follow up in August, but I held onto it in case something came up). My chances of getting in to see her any earlier are almost zero. I didn't want to keep that appointment because it Thursday during Art Fair. That week is pretty much the worst time to go to UHS all year long as all the buses will be both detoured and packed. My dentist appointment, in the same general area, is the Monday of that week, but that should be before the detours start. Official Art Fair is usually Thursday, Friday, and Saturday with set up on Wednesday.

The technician came today to do the tune up on the air conditioner. He says it all looks good (which isn't surprising given that the unit is only two or three years old). The woman from their office who called to let me know that he was on his way kind of freaked me out because she insisted that all of our windows had to be closed in order for him to work. Scott declined to shut the windows last night because the predicted high for today was 73F, and I can't shut most of the dratted things on my own (and Cordelia was still asleep). She assured me that the technician could close them for me. He was puzzled as to why she'd think it would be necessary. He said that that requirement is for when it's actually cold outside. That is, if the windows are open and it's 50F outside, it's kind of hard to get the AC to do anything so that he can see how it's working.

Anyway, that's done until the furnace tune up in the fall. We get the same guy each time, and I like him.

I've gotten the trash out. I'm holding out on the recycling in hopes that I can break down some of the boxes in the basement and get rid of them. I like keeping a few boxes in case of wanting to send a package, but we've probably got thirty Amazon boxes down there. We don't need that many, and I know there's room in the bin for at least some of them to go.
the_rck: (Default)
I slept terribly last night. My body wouldn't relax enough for sleeping for the first few hours. I'm pretty sure that it was mostly stress over needing to go out today for an appointment. I should have taken an Ativan, but getting up to do it seemed like way too much effort.

Cordelia dragged me out of bed in a panic at midnight because she'd looked at the bus website and discovered that the bus she'd planned to take to the Traverwood library today and Thursday is detoured and won't go there. There's a chunk of the route that's completely closed, so they have a bus (the A shuttle) covering the part of the route from our place to the closed area and then a bus (the B shuttle) covering from the closed area to the other end of the route. The first bus, on its way back toward downtown, takes a longish detour out to Kroger in order to let people transfer to the bus for the other half of the route. That other half seems to go to the library, but it looks like it would take a good bit longer than the normal route.

Right now, the plan is for Cordelia to catch either the A shuttle just as it starts its detour to Kroger or the bus that normally runs up and down that road and to get off at the street that leads to the library. She'll have to cross a busy road, but there's a light there, and I don't think the walk is all that far. It is possibly farther than I could comfortably walk right now, but I can't walk all that far.

I'm glad to know about the detour because that's the bus I would normally take to get to Kroger, and I'd have absolutely panicked if I got to the point where the road is closed and didn't know what was going on. I don't like the other bus option for getting there, even though the trip is shorter, because it requires crossing five lanes of traffic and because I'm not quite sure where the stop is along there.

Cordelia went downtown to the library yesterday because she had some holds that came in late on Sunday, after we'd already been down there. She was really pleased by how easy it was to get there and is trying to get me to suggest destinations that she might enjoy.

I'm hoping that my psychiatrist (who I'll see today) will have some ideas for making the c-PAP work. All of the alternatives available to me sound pretty terrible. I think it's possible that she'll tell me to take Ativan every night for a week or two to see if I get to the point where my brain accepts that the c-PAP doesn't actually reduce my chances of surviving an emergency. I'm pretty sure that that's my basic problem, and it's not amenable to me wearing the gear while awake to get used to it because it's not the gear that's the problem-- It's my sense that, when asleep, I'm hugely vulnerable and can't afford anything that makes me less able to react. This is a problem that I've had with medications that make me mentally fuzzy.

Today's to do list )
the_rck: (Default)
Waffles actually are kind of easy, at least when I'm working from a mix. The biggest hitch was the egg not wanting to mix. Scott had told me to use a spoon instead of a whisk because having lumpy batter is fine, but the egg white was kind of clumpy, so I had to go to a whisk anyway. Our waffle iron has a light that comes on when the waffle is done (my assumption is that this has to do with sensing temperature since it's the same light that comes on when the iron has preheated).

In the afternoon, after the library trip, we went to Vault of Midnight, the game and comic store downtown, and Scott got two Firefly game supplements and a cooperative game that he thinks I might enjoy.

We had dinner out for a third night in a row. This time we went to a Chinese place near the Kroger. Cordelia was unimpressed by her chicken lo mein which basically had no flavor to speak of, but we all like the chicken with mixed vegetables and shrimp with mixed vegetables that Scott and I got. The service was not stellar. I'm pretty sure that the waitress must have been inexperienced. She asked for our food order immediately after we sat down, before we'd even had time to open the menus, and kept coming back to ask at very short intervals. She never refilled our water glasses in spite of a request. After the meal, we asked for three boxes, and she brought two.

After that, we went next door to the Asian grocery and bought a lot of mochi. I also got some ginger coconut hard candies, and Cordelia got some guava sour candies and some pear juice that she's had before and really likes. Scott got a large slotted ladle which we do need. I told him that we should be shopping there for dumplings and buns and such rather than at Kroger. I'm pretty sure that the stuff there was half to two thirds the price of the same stuff at Kroger, and it's just across the street.

Scott and I watched two movies that I'd gotten from the library. Well, for certain values of watched. I'm not sure that either of us actually paid much attention to Beauty and the Beast (2017). I'm sitting at a really terrible angle to see the TV and never quite managed to get interested. Teen Titans: The Judas Contract was better and held our attention.

There's an exchange I didn't sign up for for which I'd like to write about a dozen treats, but (and this is why I didn't sign up) it has the same due date as Not Prime Time. I really don't think I'm going to write that many stories in that window. Ah, well. Maybe they'll keep the collection open for after the fact treats.

I'm considering signing up for Fic Corner, but I'm not really enthusiastic about anything that was nominated. (I didn't nominate because of computer troubles. Me nominating probably wouldn't have helped as I skew toward obscure books from the 1960s through the early 1980s.) There's one thing I'm pretty certain I could write. There are things I could probably write and am sure I own. There are things I might be able to write but am not sure I still own. There are things that might be interesting to try but that would require buying the canon (if I could find it). Many of these are books I haven't read in decades.

Today's to do list )
the_rck: (Default)
I'm still dizzy off and on. It's worse when I get overheated, and it's more likely to happen when I'm sitting or lying down than when I'm walking. It doesn't seem to relate to head movement in that it can happen when I'm lying completely still or when my upper body is still and I move one of my legs. I think that a lot of sleep helped some but not entirely. Extra water is not helpful at all. I don't have any other symptoms, so I'm not dreadfully worried, but I called UHS to see if they want me to try to come in to see someone. A nurse is supposed to call me back about that.

Apparently, it's not possible for me to get a different c-PAP face mask any time in the next ninety days because of insurance limitations. I could have gotten one if I'd managed to make it to Medequip on the Monday after my sleep disorders clinic appointment (which was on a Friday) because that was the last day of the thirty day window for making changes. I'm very, very frustrated by this. Medequip insists that it doesn't matter what insurance I have because they're all exactly the same on this. I'm not sure I buy that, but... Time to email the sleep disorders clinic people.

My laptop is crashing on me from time to time. I'm pretty sure it's the battery because the precipitating event each time has been the power supply connection getting abruptly separated. I can unplug, sometimes, without a crash, but it's a crapshoot at this point. I'm making sure to save everything before I move from one room to another. We've ordered a new battery, but we opted not to pay extra to get it tomorrow. It should arrive on Monday.

My parents made it here in time for Cordelia's graduation. As it happened, they needed to pick up a couple of doors from the local lumberyard (They were looking for something very specific, and nobody else had two doors like that).

The graduation was not quite forty minutes long. It was early enough in the day that it wasn't utterly sweltering in the multi-purpose room. I still had problems, but I'm having trouble at home where it's 78F, so... Yeah. I recorded the ceremony for Scott, but I don't think I got a high quality version. We were so far back that mostly I got backs of other parents' heads, and my arms and hands shook a lot while I held the camera. Cordelia sang with three other girls, and she was one of two students to get a Phoenix Award for exemplifying the qualities the STEAM program wants to encourage, including leadership and academic excellence.

There was a short reception on the concrete patio just outside the multi-purpose room after the ceremony. There was bottled water and cookies and fruit (for some reason no one touched the half bananas which were all turning brown on the exposed bits.

My parents and I went to Cardamom, a nearby Indian restaurant, for lunch. My mother was disappointed that her medium spicy dish was too mild. In my experience, the level of spice there varies wildly. I suspect that different cooks set mild and medium at very different degrees of heat. After lunch, they helped me run an errand that required going out to Cordelia's doctor's office to get a form signed and faxed to Skyline before the end of school day tomorrow (which will be only a half day). It was just a form that says that it's okay to give her standard OTC medications if need arises. It had to have a parent signature and a doctor signature. I suppose the latter is just in case I failed to realize that Tums or cough drops might set off Cordelia's non-existent allergies or something. I found the form irritating because I was supposed to list everything that I gave permission for. I just wanted to sign something that says that, during the week she's at camp, the nurse should use their best judgment as to what she needs to take. I'm sure I can't think of all of the possibilities.

Right now, I'm trying to decide whether or not I'm up to going to the class potluck tonight. It will be out of doors (the indoor venues were about six times more expensive), and I'm not sure how well I can handle the heat even if I'm just sitting in the shade.

I have a bit of carryover from yesterday's to do list:

Return the call that came in Tuesday while I was at my appointment
Email my sister to find out if she really can get a free viola for Cordelia
See if I can figure out how to retrieve my iTunes playlists
Find a plot or something for my NPT fic

I also need to:

Shower.

The Skyline nurse is supposed to call me tomorrow morning (I reached her today while she was in the middle of things).
the_rck: (Default)
According to my SIL, our nephew is beyond tired of the whole Eagle Scout thing. He's earned it, but the troop he was with when he fulfilled the requirements folded before he could get the bureaucratic parts dealt with, and he got jerked around a lot as a result. The ceremony will be in August, and he's trying to persuade his parents that that part isn't necessary or that, if it is, it can be five minutes folded into his graduation party in July.

I asked the clinician at radiation oncology about the patient portal's inability to realize that having a diagnostic mammogram scheduled means that one does not need a screening mammogram. She told me that that's the result of a deliberate administrative decision that she doesn't agree with. There is no way to disable that reminder as long as the patient's file says they're female. It has to be gotten rid of by a clinician every single year, and doing that has been made deliberately difficult because people were lying about screenings having happened or having been scheduled just to make the notice go away.

The clinician said that she's been trying to get them to make an exception for women who've had double mastectomies because some of them find that reminder actively traumatic because it reminds them of what they've lost. Many of them feel it's a message that they're no longer really women.

For me, it's just an irritating untidiness, but it's active cruelty for some people.

Today's to do list )
the_rck: (Default)
I've got the laundry all washed, and one load is dry and upstairs.

I very much want to nap, but I need to be ready to leave here in less than two hours, and I don't think there's time. I also think that I'm too stressed to sleep. I'm delaying taking Ativan because I think that I will need it more for our nephew's graduation which starts seven hours from now than I do for the appointment.

I've had four cups of black tea so far today and 12 oz of Coca-Cola.

I'm trying to figure out whether or not to dress up before going to my appointment. I'm not sure I'll have time to change after. Of course, I'm also not sure I have anything even remotely dressy that fits and has short sleeves.

Also, it's kind of wet outside, and, depending on timing, I may have to take the bus home. I don't think it's currently raining, but it's threatening, and everything out there is wet from earlier rain. Our concrete front steps, which are usually grayish, are kind of brown right now.

I'm also not sure that I'll get dinner tonight. It will depend on when my appointment ends and how long it takes me to get home. I'm tired enough right now, that I'm having trouble figuring out what to eat for lunch. I've had some saltines, four almonds, and two slices of cheese.

I made two phone calls yesterday but also added more calls to my to do list. I think that one of them is going to be manageable today because I'm probably going to get voicemail. Maybe I can manage calling Medequip, too, but I'm not going to get upset with myself if I don't.

Cordelia enjoyed Greenfield Village but was annoyed by the gift shop because nothing had any sort of price tag. The only way to find out what things cost was to take them up to the register and ask, so the line was very, very long the entire time her class was shopping.
the_rck: (Default)
Cordelia's officially done with physical therapy for now. She admitted to us yesterday that she hasn't been doing her exercises because she's been utterly exhausted, so I'm a bit worried about things going forward.

She made it to the GSA bowling party only about forty five minutes after it started. She said it was a lot of fun but that only four out of the six members of her school's group made it. It was a multi-school event, so there were still a lot of people there.

The eighth graders are at Greenfield Village today. That's an outdoor historical recreation(ish) space an hour or so away from here. There's a large museum there, too, but people tend to go to one or the other. My sixth grade class, back in the late 1970s, spent a day at Greenfield Village. We were all supposed to dress up in nineteenth century clothing (or as close as we could get) for a short stint in a one room schoolhouse. I had a granny dress, so I was set. Mrs Pattinson, who was a very tall, thin woman in her fifties (or possibly sixties), looked very impressive as I recall. I have no recollection of what anyone else wore. I'm pretty sure that we used slates and facsimile primers.

I have no idea what activities Cordelia and her classmates will be undertaking. I look forward to her telling me about it.

I'm going to be spending a lot of time on laundry for the next few days. I'm not at all enthusiastic about it, especially when it comes to tomorrow, but I haven't got a choice. Cordelia can help on Saturday and Sunday. Scott's ability to help depends on whether or not he has to work the weekend. It'll be five loads today (one done, one in the dryer, one in the wash, two waiting). I'm hoping that subsequent days will only require three loads as that's a lot less exhausting.

My hands are hurting a lot, so I'm wearing my heaviest splints. Those will make putting the fitted sheet on the bed a challenge, but I don't think I can do it at all without some sort of splint. Things haven't been this bad since I stopped the Tamoxifen at the beginning of April.

I'm trying to figure out which of my library books I can finish quickly. I'm done with the one book due this week that can't be renewed, and there aren't any due next week that can't be renewed. I would like to get through some of these books or, at least, to read enough of some of them to know I don't want to go further.

I have three phone calls I should make today. Sadly, the easy one is also the least urgent.

October 2017

S M T W T F S
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
8 9 10 11 12 13 14
15 161718192021
22232425262728
293031    

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Oct. 17th, 2017 03:52 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios