(no subject)

[the_rck]

Scott went back to work today. I miss having him home. We were a little concerned that he might be expected back on first shift, but they seem to have expected him for second. I expect they'll keep him on second shift until things start going back to normal.

Right now, I'm watching The Mandalorian and listening to a storm. The rain sounds heavy, and there's thunder and a lot of wind. I'm glad Cordelia already took the trash to the curb.

I haven't done any writing today or much of anything else, really. I forgot to take my bedtime meds last night and ended up not sleeping until after 4 a.m. when I finally took my meds.

I'm in a restless state. I want to do something or to have something happen. I think it's the anticipatory stress. None of us know what's going to happen, and it's wearing on all three of us. The fact that Scott has to go out to work makes it harder, more uncertain, but also makes things feel more normal.

Comments

[wendelah1]

His job is deemed essential? Because it's connected with food production. Of course.

Our son has to work, too. It is scary, not knowing what will happen. Of course, we never know, really, but that's so impossible to live with that we tell ourselves that we have it all under control.

[the_rck]

Yeah, Scott's job is connected with food production. He makes plastic bottles for water and milk and such. There are still places in the state where the tap water isn't drinkable, so I think his plant would be necessary even without the milk bottles.

One of the main symptoms of my anxiety is that I can never put aside awareness that unexpected bad things might happen. I don't even need to think about what those things might be; that part's irrelevant. That awareness means that quite small things can throw me into a panic.