the_rck

I just defaulted on my Past Imperfect assignment. I regret it because I love writing time travel stories. I'm keeping my FFFEx assignment because it's partly done, because there're a few days more until the deadline, and because I suspect that it will be harder to find a pinch hitter for it.

My reason is that my mother texted me this morning to tell me that she has breast cancer. She says they caught it early and that it doesn't seem to be aggressive but that they don't know for sure yet. She also doesn't know what sort of treatment will be involved. She's 76, and she feels that some treatments aren't really on the table. I'm not sure if she means that she thinks they won't offer or if she means that she's not willing to put herself through anything long and painful.

I know that she has concerns about Alzheimer's based on her father. She's getting close to the age when he started showing evidence of it.

I'm more upset than I expected to be when I thought, in theoretical terms, about the probability that I could lose her at any time. We don't see each other often, and we don't talk much. She's not enthusiastic about people interactions that aren't work related. I guess I assumed that my feelings had atrophied during the last twenty years after I gave up chasing after something she couldn't give me because she didn't understand why anyone would want it.

Anyway, I expect this will mean that my parents stay in Louisiana all summer. I'm pretty sure that treatment will be easier in Baton Rouge than in Lawton. I suppose it depends on the duration of treatment and recovery/follow up. Mom tends to drive north alone in March or April with my step-father following in June, with the dogs, and that seems likely to be a bad idea.

Then again, two of her three kids are in Michigan. My brother's less than half an hour from Lawton. I'm two hours away. The pandemic and my inability to drive complicate any prospects for visiting, though, so I don't know that proximity to us will be a major consideration. If it is, I think that will be a bad sign.