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Jan. 26th, 2016 01:32 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
the_rckI overfilled the very large box I had for books that are basement bound and didn’t get through all of the shelves in the bedroom. I’m not sure what to do about that. Taking books to the basement, a few at a time, will take a very long time for me because I really don’t have any stamina to speak of. I might manage three trips a day with six to ten books at a time, but a lot of these books can’t be shelved right now because our cleaning lady has piled boxes and such in the bit of the basement that houses my manga, the anthologies (paperback anyway), the A-K paperbacks, and the H-R hardcovers.
I kept the Narnia books, the books by Diana Wynne Jones that I have up here, and the things I haven’t read yet on the bedroom shelves. I need to weed the unread stuff and get rid of the things I know I’m never, ever going to read. Some things have been on those shelves nearly as long as Cordelia has been alive. At this point, I really very much doubt I’m ever going to read them. I am moving some things that Scott read and liked but that I have not read and probably won’t to the basement shelves. I don’t think he finds being surrounded by books as viscerally comforting as I do, but he keeps books, too.
The fact that I found moving books from the bedroom to the living room makes me think that I’m not ready to go back to shelving books at Cordelia’s school. I don’t want to volunteer for less than an hour at a time, but I may not be able to manage more than about ten minutes (and then need to rest before I try to walk home). It’s very, very frustrating. I can’t even try using our treadmill to get started on rebuilding because it’s in that corner of the basement that’s filled with boxes and other crap.
Yesterday’s PT was another hour long appointment. I expected it to be only half an hour. The PT is pleased with my progress with regard to the massage, and she spent about twenty minutes using a little suction device on various parts of my breast. That’s supposed to loosen up the deep tissue that I can’t get to by massage. She says that the radiation damage has made all the tissue in there contract and that that’s leading to fluid build up. She’s hopeful that we’ll only need a couple more appointments to get this cleared up.
I have reminded my oncologist that he promised to refer me for genetic testing. One of his nurses got back to me. Apparently, I have to fill out a bunch of paperwork and then send that back before they can schedule me.![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
evalerie has been urging me to try 23andme which is a vast amount cheaper than official testing. The drawback, however, is that information from 23andme can’t be used by formal researchers or put into my official medical record. My sister’s doctors want me tested because they’re of the opinion that, if I have the same PALB2 mutation she does, that’s fairly indicative that the 'likely benign' designation is wrong and that researchers in China and Australia are on the mark. I haven’t looked into insurance coverage for the testing yet, and I need to do that. Aetna may not want to pay for it, but I think Medicare is likely to even if Aetna doesn’t. According to my sister, official testing costs about $4000 if one has to pay out of pocket.
Cordelia basically told us yesterday that the draw of her school’s gay-straight alliance is the free snacks more than anything else. She complained that a bunch of sixth graders have joined and that now there aren’t enough snacks for everybody. Nobody in the group is publicly identifying as queer in any way which, for a bunch of ten, eleven, and twelve year olds doesn’t entirely surprise me. I’m sure there are kids who are and who know they are, but there are also kids who haven’t really thought about it yet, either because they don’t feel safe doing it or because they’re young enough that applying that sort of thing to themselves feels alien in some other way. The group is having speakers in from the local community college, so I’m hopeful that something’s happening besides free snacks.
At my suggestion, Scott browned our leftover ground turkey last night and added it to broccoli cheddar soup he made from a mix. I had planned to do that myself yesterday, but he started cooking while I was still psyching myself up for it. I think he’s so far out of the habit of me cooking that it doesn’t even occur to him that I might. I know I’m far enough out of the habit of it that I don’t necessarily think of it at a point when it’s reasonable to do it.
I want to bake today. I’m not sure what to bake. The things that appeal to me most may be beyond my stamina (or not, I won’t know until I get there), so I’m kind of afraid of trying them. I know I can make brownies or cake from a mix. That takes ten minutes, and I’ve done it a couple of times in the last two months. I’d just like to do more than that. We still have the ingredients for gooey butter bars and for chocolate chip bars.
Scott bought me a couple of new types of instant coffee, the kind without sweetener or creamer added. One (Folgers) is packets of powder to add to hot water. That one is fast and strong and works pretty well. The other (Kroger brand) is teabag sorts of things with coffee grounds in them. Those only work if I let them steep for at least ten minutes (and preferably longer). I’ve been adding stevia and a flavored creamer. I’m not sure that that I’m cutting any calories because the creamer seems to have as much sugar as the old instant coffee. I do think I’m getting more caffeine, however, so maybe this is the way to go.
Hm. I may not bake or venture into the basement today. I got light headed while I was getting my lunch. I’m going to eat and drink a lot of water and see if that helps any. It was momentary, but I really don’t want it happening while I’m on the stairs or in the middle of something that I need to finish on some sort of schedule. Of course, Cordelia will be home in a little more than two hours. I’ll feel better about trying the stairs if there’s someone else in the house with me.
I kept the Narnia books, the books by Diana Wynne Jones that I have up here, and the things I haven’t read yet on the bedroom shelves. I need to weed the unread stuff and get rid of the things I know I’m never, ever going to read. Some things have been on those shelves nearly as long as Cordelia has been alive. At this point, I really very much doubt I’m ever going to read them. I am moving some things that Scott read and liked but that I have not read and probably won’t to the basement shelves. I don’t think he finds being surrounded by books as viscerally comforting as I do, but he keeps books, too.
The fact that I found moving books from the bedroom to the living room makes me think that I’m not ready to go back to shelving books at Cordelia’s school. I don’t want to volunteer for less than an hour at a time, but I may not be able to manage more than about ten minutes (and then need to rest before I try to walk home). It’s very, very frustrating. I can’t even try using our treadmill to get started on rebuilding because it’s in that corner of the basement that’s filled with boxes and other crap.
Yesterday’s PT was another hour long appointment. I expected it to be only half an hour. The PT is pleased with my progress with regard to the massage, and she spent about twenty minutes using a little suction device on various parts of my breast. That’s supposed to loosen up the deep tissue that I can’t get to by massage. She says that the radiation damage has made all the tissue in there contract and that that’s leading to fluid build up. She’s hopeful that we’ll only need a couple more appointments to get this cleared up.
I have reminded my oncologist that he promised to refer me for genetic testing. One of his nurses got back to me. Apparently, I have to fill out a bunch of paperwork and then send that back before they can schedule me.
evalerie has been urging me to try 23andme which is a vast amount cheaper than official testing. The drawback, however, is that information from 23andme can’t be used by formal researchers or put into my official medical record. My sister’s doctors want me tested because they’re of the opinion that, if I have the same PALB2 mutation she does, that’s fairly indicative that the 'likely benign' designation is wrong and that researchers in China and Australia are on the mark. I haven’t looked into insurance coverage for the testing yet, and I need to do that. Aetna may not want to pay for it, but I think Medicare is likely to even if Aetna doesn’t. According to my sister, official testing costs about $4000 if one has to pay out of pocket.Cordelia basically told us yesterday that the draw of her school’s gay-straight alliance is the free snacks more than anything else. She complained that a bunch of sixth graders have joined and that now there aren’t enough snacks for everybody. Nobody in the group is publicly identifying as queer in any way which, for a bunch of ten, eleven, and twelve year olds doesn’t entirely surprise me. I’m sure there are kids who are and who know they are, but there are also kids who haven’t really thought about it yet, either because they don’t feel safe doing it or because they’re young enough that applying that sort of thing to themselves feels alien in some other way. The group is having speakers in from the local community college, so I’m hopeful that something’s happening besides free snacks.
At my suggestion, Scott browned our leftover ground turkey last night and added it to broccoli cheddar soup he made from a mix. I had planned to do that myself yesterday, but he started cooking while I was still psyching myself up for it. I think he’s so far out of the habit of me cooking that it doesn’t even occur to him that I might. I know I’m far enough out of the habit of it that I don’t necessarily think of it at a point when it’s reasonable to do it.
I want to bake today. I’m not sure what to bake. The things that appeal to me most may be beyond my stamina (or not, I won’t know until I get there), so I’m kind of afraid of trying them. I know I can make brownies or cake from a mix. That takes ten minutes, and I’ve done it a couple of times in the last two months. I’d just like to do more than that. We still have the ingredients for gooey butter bars and for chocolate chip bars.
Scott bought me a couple of new types of instant coffee, the kind without sweetener or creamer added. One (Folgers) is packets of powder to add to hot water. That one is fast and strong and works pretty well. The other (Kroger brand) is teabag sorts of things with coffee grounds in them. Those only work if I let them steep for at least ten minutes (and preferably longer). I’ve been adding stevia and a flavored creamer. I’m not sure that that I’m cutting any calories because the creamer seems to have as much sugar as the old instant coffee. I do think I’m getting more caffeine, however, so maybe this is the way to go.
Hm. I may not bake or venture into the basement today. I got light headed while I was getting my lunch. I’m going to eat and drink a lot of water and see if that helps any. It was momentary, but I really don’t want it happening while I’m on the stairs or in the middle of something that I need to finish on some sort of schedule. Of course, Cordelia will be home in a little more than two hours. I’ll feel better about trying the stairs if there’s someone else in the house with me.
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no subject
Date: 2016-01-26 09:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-01-27 02:40 am (UTC)Of course people are more likely to come to ANY meeting if there are snacks. And from what you've said of Cordelia at this age, I wouldn't be even slightly surprised if she hadn't thought much about the group's intentions, and was just following her friends to their favorite good cause.
no subject
Date: 2016-01-27 03:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-01-27 05:51 pm (UTC)Cordelia joined a while back at the urging of a friend who said it was fun. She's kind of annoyed by the new members (there was a big influx of sixth graders last week), mostly because of the snack issue. (I'm kind of surprised nobody's asked parents to help with snacks. Maybe that's coming.) She was kind of pleased that none of the new members could vote at the last meeting when the group elected officers. I'm not sure that they should have held elections that soon after getting a lot of new members as I'd think that would create bad feelings.
no subject
Date: 2016-01-27 05:57 pm (UTC)I have no idea if she's thought at all about her own identity in that direction. I haven't wanted to ask because it's personal and not something that affects our relationship with her and because I don't want her to think that we think she should have such an identity right this moment and have it set in stone forever. She's twelve.