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Jul. 17th, 2016 11:35 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
the_rckScott’s parents want us there at 2:00 if it’s possible. We can probably do that if Scott showers quickly and we get the library out of the way as soon as it opens. It’s an hour drive up there, usually.
Cordelia wants to stay home because she’s feeling rotten. I’m inclined to let her and to stay home with her. Scott’s feeling guilty about the idea of not going. I think the fact that Cordelia’s never had an illness that interfered with family stuff before comes into play for Scott. He can’t quite believe it. It’s also very different from me being sick and staying home. He can generally leave me at home on my own when I’m sick.
Scott’s mother didn’t get back to me about what we should bring until about 4:30 yesterday. At that point, Scott had already done the grocery shopping. I had told her that I have some canned baked beans, and she said those would be good. I’m trying to decide how much we need for eight people. I have two small cans and one large can. The large can is a different brand and flavor than the small ones, but I’m not sure that it matters. I’m considering adding something else to the beans for additional flavor but maybe not. Baked beans are kind of basic. I’m a bit worried about the sugar content and how that will interact with Scott’s father’s diabetes.
That’s new in the last year and a half, so we’re all still adapting. We’re running into difficulties with the fact that I can’t have any of the artificial sweeteners that are good for cooking. For example, if a dessert contains Truvia, I shouldn’t eat it because of what will happen later on. If it contains sugar, he shouldn’t eat it. I also can’t have Splenda (sucralose) or Nutrasweet (aspartame). I’m okay with pure stevia, but if there’s erithyrtol— or any sugar alcohol— mixed in (and there almost always is), I will get pretty sick.
My gastroenterologist told me to use Benefiber every day. She said that it would stop me from having cramping urgency and generally make everything work better. I tried it for about three weeks and then stopped. I’ve been better without it than I was with it. With it, I was tending more toward diarrhea, and the urgency didn’t go away. I think the urgency issues were mostly stress related because they’ve eased off now, very gradually, and were at their worst in May when I was so hugely stressed out. I’m not currently having huge issues with cramping urgency, but I am having more bowel movements than I consider normal and not small ones.
I’m thinking that I may try a week with Benefiber, probably next week when I don’t have any appointments, just to see how that is when I’m not coming down from a long period of high anxiety. My guess is that, absent the anxiety, it won’t make anything worse but also won’t make anything better.
I’m thinking that I need to talk to my primary care doctor about those days like yesterday when I can’t wake up properly. I think it’s something physiological (the fact that a greasy cheeseburger reliably helps seems an indication of that). She may not agree, but talking to her seems like a starting point. Right now, I think I’ll take yesterday’s posts as my starting point for trying to explain the problem.
I’m going to talk to my psychiatrist, however, about the half-asleep thing I’ve been having with suddenly being convinced that I have to do certain things or bad things will happen. So far, it’s all been lying a certain way in bed or pulling on or putting off blankets, but… I worry about something else coming up that way. This is new since the lumpectomy last August, and I’m not sure it started until some time during radiation treatment, but it certainly wasn’t later than that.
Cordelia wants to stay home because she’s feeling rotten. I’m inclined to let her and to stay home with her. Scott’s feeling guilty about the idea of not going. I think the fact that Cordelia’s never had an illness that interfered with family stuff before comes into play for Scott. He can’t quite believe it. It’s also very different from me being sick and staying home. He can generally leave me at home on my own when I’m sick.
Scott’s mother didn’t get back to me about what we should bring until about 4:30 yesterday. At that point, Scott had already done the grocery shopping. I had told her that I have some canned baked beans, and she said those would be good. I’m trying to decide how much we need for eight people. I have two small cans and one large can. The large can is a different brand and flavor than the small ones, but I’m not sure that it matters. I’m considering adding something else to the beans for additional flavor but maybe not. Baked beans are kind of basic. I’m a bit worried about the sugar content and how that will interact with Scott’s father’s diabetes.
That’s new in the last year and a half, so we’re all still adapting. We’re running into difficulties with the fact that I can’t have any of the artificial sweeteners that are good for cooking. For example, if a dessert contains Truvia, I shouldn’t eat it because of what will happen later on. If it contains sugar, he shouldn’t eat it. I also can’t have Splenda (sucralose) or Nutrasweet (aspartame). I’m okay with pure stevia, but if there’s erithyrtol— or any sugar alcohol— mixed in (and there almost always is), I will get pretty sick.
My gastroenterologist told me to use Benefiber every day. She said that it would stop me from having cramping urgency and generally make everything work better. I tried it for about three weeks and then stopped. I’ve been better without it than I was with it. With it, I was tending more toward diarrhea, and the urgency didn’t go away. I think the urgency issues were mostly stress related because they’ve eased off now, very gradually, and were at their worst in May when I was so hugely stressed out. I’m not currently having huge issues with cramping urgency, but I am having more bowel movements than I consider normal and not small ones.
I’m thinking that I may try a week with Benefiber, probably next week when I don’t have any appointments, just to see how that is when I’m not coming down from a long period of high anxiety. My guess is that, absent the anxiety, it won’t make anything worse but also won’t make anything better.
I’m thinking that I need to talk to my primary care doctor about those days like yesterday when I can’t wake up properly. I think it’s something physiological (the fact that a greasy cheeseburger reliably helps seems an indication of that). She may not agree, but talking to her seems like a starting point. Right now, I think I’ll take yesterday’s posts as my starting point for trying to explain the problem.
I’m going to talk to my psychiatrist, however, about the half-asleep thing I’ve been having with suddenly being convinced that I have to do certain things or bad things will happen. So far, it’s all been lying a certain way in bed or pulling on or putting off blankets, but… I worry about something else coming up that way. This is new since the lumpectomy last August, and I’m not sure it started until some time during radiation treatment, but it certainly wasn’t later than that.
