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Jan. 13th, 2008 03:19 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
the_rckI'm not willing to call these resolutions. The word carries too much weight. Call them goals instead. That's still a heavy word for all it floats high, out of reach. I'm going to divide these up into subsections.
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cherydactyl told me about doing the 101 in 1001 challenge, 101 goals to be met in 1001 days. I couldn't come up with 101 goals without being silly, but I did note down a lot of things that I want to or need to do. There are also a lot of things that I could put on there but am not going to because I think they might be too much for me or might make me crumple if I look at them too far in advance. (That's a trick with anxiety. I've learned that there are things that I have to come at sideways and not think about until it's time to deal with them. It's not the same as ignoring them because I'm not putting them off, just waiting to let them into my mind until it's time to deal with them. It's kind of like putting an impending performance out of one's mind in the time between the last rehearsal and when one starts the run into the performance.)
Ongoing and repeating goals:
Booklogging - catch up and update once a month. I've still got a few dozen titles to blog of things I read between July and December. I may end up only commenting on some of them and just posting a list of the rest. I'd like to start clean with this month's reading. Caught up as of 20 Jan. 2008.
Write recs - catch up and update once a month. I did an update in late August or early September. It contained maybe a third of the fics I'd noted to rec. I need to finish the rest of those and the new links that I've added since then. I may have to set a goal of so many recs written a week or month in order to make it. Right now, the task looks impossible. Especially once I start thinking about the Yuletide archives.
Use treadmill at least three times a week (when not wheezing already). If I can manage a quarter mile right now, I'll be happy. That doesn't even take ten minutes, so it's hard for me to excuse my own inertia in not going down to the basement and *doing* it.
Read at least a book week from my to-be-read pile. At this point, I don't care if I finish the book or just start it and decide to get rid of it without finishing it. Either way, it's a book off the pile. The hard part will be the ones that I started months ago, liked enough to want to finish, but have now forgotten enough to need to start over from the beginning. Those are the hardest.
Crochet scarves and hats with my yarn stash - maybe one a week? I've finished two scarves and a hat since the beginning of the year. One scarf had been started and more or less abandoned in November. I'm not sure it counts.
Catch up on e-mail and stay current. This one's probably wishful thinking. Still, it's something I'd like to manage.
Figure out how to get rid of the scarves hats I make and then *do* it. This one has a lot of wrinkles since I no longer have records of what the yarn I bought cost nor have I any idea how to work sales tax and other legal bookkeeping things. I also don't know now what all of the yarn I have is made of (making descriptions harder). I can be sure that none of it is all animal fiber because those make my hands itch, but some of the yarns have a small amount of wool in them.
Write at least 100 words of fiction a day. I haven't even started on this.
Deal with Delia's savings account statements as they arrive. I've caught up on them. Now I just have to be prompt. It's not like it's hard. Each statement has three transactions and interest. It takes longer to open Quicken than it does to enter the transactions and reconcile the account.
Chart headaches, asthma, menstrual cycle, medications, etc. I've set up an Excel spreadsheet, but it's rather unwieldy. I may need to make several spreadsheets instead of trying to keep everything in one place. I'm also a couple of days behind due to the computer troubles.
Keep record of new meds tried, side effects, benefits (if any) and so on. I've been wanting to do this-- needing to do this-- for years. It's something that everybody should do because it's the sort of data that's important, hard to remember years later, and very hard to dig out of a long medical history.
Do yoga at least once a week (preferably on a day when I don't use the treadmill). This one may be the hardest because yoga requires more time than the treadmill and requires that I not eat for a while before it. The best time for me to do it would probably be in the morning, in the gap between my morning meds and breakfast (I have to wait twenty minutes between the meds and eating). Of course, that's the time when Delia and I usually cuddle.
Do something nice for myself every week. I have to decide what qualifies as 'nice.' It may end up being fairly simple-- a few minutes of listening to music every week. It may also need to vary more. Just not books and not food.
More playdates for Delia. This will be a challenge because it involves phone calls and scheduling, but it's something that will be good for Delia.
Big tasks: (These'll go better if I figure out how to break them into pieces.)
Finish Rheotaxis. I have a bit of chapter 18 written, and I know how chapter 19 starts. I just have to find time for it.
Finish cataloging our books. I think I'm halfway through. I'm torn. I like DeliciousLibrary because it stores the catalog locally. I dislike it because it's slower than a slug in winter after one hits about 2000 entries. The documentation makes it clear that that problem only gets worse (the programmers consider 3000 records the functional limit.) LibraryThing, if we pay them, would accommodate all our records, but it's not local. I'm also not sure-- Is there a way to keep one's catalog there private? I'm not interested in the social aspects of LibraryThing. They've been both convenient and inconvenient for our pre-school library. I also don't like the way that LibraryThing can suddenly change the record appearance and such. Change isn't always bad, but I'd like to be able to decide whether or not I want to 'upgrade.'
Do Novel in 90, at least once (might be a way to make the other writing projects move). I'm not sure that I want to do this one, but I'm listing it anyway. After I've managed a few weeks of 100 words a day, I'll evaluate the possibilities.
Finish Brainwashing arc. I started this one for the Weiss Kreuz anonymous kink meme. It wants a full out AU arc, and I'm intrigued by the possibilities.
Finish Apotheosis arc. This is what I call the AU arc that starts with "Snare." I have a few pages written of the next scene and a few pages written the go near the end (so I know where I'm aiming).
Finish Rurouni Kenshin fic arc. I started this around the time I started "Rheotaxis." I've given "Rheotaxis" priority because there are essential sections of this one that require things I'm bad at writing. I came up with a name for the arc, but I've forgotten it. That probably means that it's not the right name.
Finish Delia's afghan. I started this one two years ago. It's meant for a twin sized bed. I want to finish it before Delia outgrows her current blankets. That time is fast approaching, but I've only got a couple of feet done. Fortunately, I picked a yarn where dye lot doesn't matter. I'm trying to figure out how to break this one up. A row a day, maybe?
Finish my afghan. This one's all cotton. I want something for my side of the bed that won't hold dust when it's washed and that will add some warmth in the winter. I'm maybe three feet into the afghan. I'd like it to be at least six feet long. I'm not sure if I should give priority to this one or to Delia's. Both are unwieldy to work with because of their size.
Read Yuletide 2006 archive. Last year, I suffered a morale failure and simply couldn't face the archive. Last fall, I started working my way backward through the daily fic lists on the community. I made it back to 25 July. I need to pick that back up and work through the rest of the stories, keeping track of recs as I go.
Mine Yuletide 2007 for recs. I managed to read the stories in the fandoms with which I'm most familiar. I didn't, however, stop to note which stories I wanted to rec. I was too cranky to be fair much of the time and probably would have rec'd everything I read during the times when I wasn't cranky, just in an attempt to balance out the cranky times. I'm hoping that a little bit of time will also make some stories stand out more clearly in my mind.
Write about anxiety. I keep intending to write about what it's like to live with severe anxiety. I've seen people write about depression and bipolar and other such things, and I feel like I might have something useful to say about anxiety. If nothing else, I can come up with analogies about how it feels.
Get through the long term disability review. I need to find a way to be calm about this. I also need to find some long term coping techniques so that the next review (and the one after that and the one after that) don't wreck me quite so badly.
Decluttering the house (except the study. That's Scott's). This needs to be done a little at a time. I'm currently trying to get Delia to give up some of her books. She doesn't want to, not even the ones she never reads. I suppose it's hereditary.
Relatively little tasks:
Kindergarten Round-up Feb. 20, time TBD. This shouldn't be a big deal. I called the school, and they promised to mail us information. I think all I'll need to do is show up and fill out some papers.
Post "Zymogenesis" to website. I've formatted the dratted thing. I just need to upload it. Done.
Announce "Zymogenesis" on LJ/IJ.
Post notice about "Rustication" to Ranma ½ community on LJ. (Is there a Ranma community on IJ? Find out).
Send e-mail to updates list "Rustication" and "Zymogenesis."
Rewrite and post kink meme fics. Perhaps I should list the four of them separately, but they're a lump in my head at present.
Write thank you notes for Christmas presents. I'll give priority to Delia's notes.
Schedule mammogram. I should have done this in July. I put it off. Then I lost the referral. Now I have another referral. I just have to do it.
Find a psychiatrist. The long term disability review people want a psychiatrist's evaluation. I'm hesitant to get involved with one because I'm not ready to try medications right now. I have an equilibrium that lets me function in the ways I need to. I'm afraid that tinkering with it will make things worse rather than better. There will come a time when the possibility of making things better is worth the risk of making things worse, but it's going to be a while. Well, unless something else changes to make my illness worse.
Things to watch (that I already have in hand):
Finish watching Ayatsuri Sakon
Finish watching Saiunkoko
Finish watching Buso Renkin
Finish watching Twelve Kingdoms
Watch Honey and Clover
Watch Nodame Cantabile
Rewatch Scrapped Princess
Rewatch Pretear
Rewatch Pretender season 4
Bite sized (mostly writing) projects:
Write up pre-school job - I have disconnected notes. I just need to put them in order.
Finish race in anime/manga essay - have first draft and beta comments
Narnia/Secret Garden fic - have three pages, some handwritten
Amber fic 1 - Merlin and Random, gen, half done
Amber fic 2 - Merlin and Random, slash, half done (three attempts)
Back to the Future fic - have first sentence and concept
write about first Queen of Narnia - definite concept
Read Amy's fics - I need to find out if I have all of them
Comment on Amy's fics
Post Amy's fics
Statler and Waldorf fic - vague concept
Lost Prince fic - vague concept
Demon Diary fic - promised giftfic, no ideas
Amy gift fic - no ideas
Three Investigators fic - promised giftfic, no ideas
Other stuff:
Learn to make granny squares. Afghans would be so much easier if I could do them in small pieces rather than as one big project. The problem is that I suck at counting stitches. Anybody know any easy granny squares?
Volunteer at Delia's kindergarten next fall. I'm kind of scared of this one, but I think it might be good for me to commit to getting out once a week. No more than that. I'm hoping to have fall be easier than right now, not harder.
Plan meals. This would make food shopping easier. Right now, we have the problem of buying meat and fresh vegetables or fruit and not using them before they go bad and of not thawing frozen meat in time to cook it when we need to. Of course, we also hit the problem that, some nights, I simply can't eat whatever it is we've planned. Leftovers going bad is yet another problem. ::ponders::
Try one book that I never thought I would read.
Try a book that I didn't like a while ago and see if I like it more now.
Find writing cheerleaders. Having them helps a *lot*. Jenn's very good for some projects, but she doesn't care much for "Rheotaxis," and her schedule doesn't match mine particularly well. Sometimes, we're lucky, and sometimes, we miss each other online for days at a time.
Learn to use IRC and non-AIM chat programs.
cherydactyl told me about doing the 101 in 1001 challenge, 101 goals to be met in 1001 days. I couldn't come up with 101 goals without being silly, but I did note down a lot of things that I want to or need to do. There are also a lot of things that I could put on there but am not going to because I think they might be too much for me or might make me crumple if I look at them too far in advance. (That's a trick with anxiety. I've learned that there are things that I have to come at sideways and not think about until it's time to deal with them. It's not the same as ignoring them because I'm not putting them off, just waiting to let them into my mind until it's time to deal with them. It's kind of like putting an impending performance out of one's mind in the time between the last rehearsal and when one starts the run into the performance.)Ongoing and repeating goals:
Booklogging - catch up and update once a month. I've still got a few dozen titles to blog of things I read between July and December. I may end up only commenting on some of them and just posting a list of the rest. I'd like to start clean with this month's reading. Caught up as of 20 Jan. 2008.
Write recs - catch up and update once a month. I did an update in late August or early September. It contained maybe a third of the fics I'd noted to rec. I need to finish the rest of those and the new links that I've added since then. I may have to set a goal of so many recs written a week or month in order to make it. Right now, the task looks impossible. Especially once I start thinking about the Yuletide archives.
Use treadmill at least three times a week (when not wheezing already). If I can manage a quarter mile right now, I'll be happy. That doesn't even take ten minutes, so it's hard for me to excuse my own inertia in not going down to the basement and *doing* it.
Read at least a book week from my to-be-read pile. At this point, I don't care if I finish the book or just start it and decide to get rid of it without finishing it. Either way, it's a book off the pile. The hard part will be the ones that I started months ago, liked enough to want to finish, but have now forgotten enough to need to start over from the beginning. Those are the hardest.
Crochet scarves and hats with my yarn stash - maybe one a week? I've finished two scarves and a hat since the beginning of the year. One scarf had been started and more or less abandoned in November. I'm not sure it counts.
Catch up on e-mail and stay current. This one's probably wishful thinking. Still, it's something I'd like to manage.
Figure out how to get rid of the scarves hats I make and then *do* it. This one has a lot of wrinkles since I no longer have records of what the yarn I bought cost nor have I any idea how to work sales tax and other legal bookkeeping things. I also don't know now what all of the yarn I have is made of (making descriptions harder). I can be sure that none of it is all animal fiber because those make my hands itch, but some of the yarns have a small amount of wool in them.
Write at least 100 words of fiction a day. I haven't even started on this.
Deal with Delia's savings account statements as they arrive. I've caught up on them. Now I just have to be prompt. It's not like it's hard. Each statement has three transactions and interest. It takes longer to open Quicken than it does to enter the transactions and reconcile the account.
Chart headaches, asthma, menstrual cycle, medications, etc. I've set up an Excel spreadsheet, but it's rather unwieldy. I may need to make several spreadsheets instead of trying to keep everything in one place. I'm also a couple of days behind due to the computer troubles.
Keep record of new meds tried, side effects, benefits (if any) and so on. I've been wanting to do this-- needing to do this-- for years. It's something that everybody should do because it's the sort of data that's important, hard to remember years later, and very hard to dig out of a long medical history.
Do yoga at least once a week (preferably on a day when I don't use the treadmill). This one may be the hardest because yoga requires more time than the treadmill and requires that I not eat for a while before it. The best time for me to do it would probably be in the morning, in the gap between my morning meds and breakfast (I have to wait twenty minutes between the meds and eating). Of course, that's the time when Delia and I usually cuddle.
Do something nice for myself every week. I have to decide what qualifies as 'nice.' It may end up being fairly simple-- a few minutes of listening to music every week. It may also need to vary more. Just not books and not food.
More playdates for Delia. This will be a challenge because it involves phone calls and scheduling, but it's something that will be good for Delia.
Big tasks: (These'll go better if I figure out how to break them into pieces.)
Finish Rheotaxis. I have a bit of chapter 18 written, and I know how chapter 19 starts. I just have to find time for it.
Finish cataloging our books. I think I'm halfway through. I'm torn. I like DeliciousLibrary because it stores the catalog locally. I dislike it because it's slower than a slug in winter after one hits about 2000 entries. The documentation makes it clear that that problem only gets worse (the programmers consider 3000 records the functional limit.) LibraryThing, if we pay them, would accommodate all our records, but it's not local. I'm also not sure-- Is there a way to keep one's catalog there private? I'm not interested in the social aspects of LibraryThing. They've been both convenient and inconvenient for our pre-school library. I also don't like the way that LibraryThing can suddenly change the record appearance and such. Change isn't always bad, but I'd like to be able to decide whether or not I want to 'upgrade.'
Do Novel in 90, at least once (might be a way to make the other writing projects move). I'm not sure that I want to do this one, but I'm listing it anyway. After I've managed a few weeks of 100 words a day, I'll evaluate the possibilities.
Finish Brainwashing arc. I started this one for the Weiss Kreuz anonymous kink meme. It wants a full out AU arc, and I'm intrigued by the possibilities.
Finish Apotheosis arc. This is what I call the AU arc that starts with "Snare." I have a few pages written of the next scene and a few pages written the go near the end (so I know where I'm aiming).
Finish Rurouni Kenshin fic arc. I started this around the time I started "Rheotaxis." I've given "Rheotaxis" priority because there are essential sections of this one that require things I'm bad at writing. I came up with a name for the arc, but I've forgotten it. That probably means that it's not the right name.
Finish Delia's afghan. I started this one two years ago. It's meant for a twin sized bed. I want to finish it before Delia outgrows her current blankets. That time is fast approaching, but I've only got a couple of feet done. Fortunately, I picked a yarn where dye lot doesn't matter. I'm trying to figure out how to break this one up. A row a day, maybe?
Finish my afghan. This one's all cotton. I want something for my side of the bed that won't hold dust when it's washed and that will add some warmth in the winter. I'm maybe three feet into the afghan. I'd like it to be at least six feet long. I'm not sure if I should give priority to this one or to Delia's. Both are unwieldy to work with because of their size.
Read Yuletide 2006 archive. Last year, I suffered a morale failure and simply couldn't face the archive. Last fall, I started working my way backward through the daily fic lists on the community. I made it back to 25 July. I need to pick that back up and work through the rest of the stories, keeping track of recs as I go.
Mine Yuletide 2007 for recs. I managed to read the stories in the fandoms with which I'm most familiar. I didn't, however, stop to note which stories I wanted to rec. I was too cranky to be fair much of the time and probably would have rec'd everything I read during the times when I wasn't cranky, just in an attempt to balance out the cranky times. I'm hoping that a little bit of time will also make some stories stand out more clearly in my mind.
Write about anxiety. I keep intending to write about what it's like to live with severe anxiety. I've seen people write about depression and bipolar and other such things, and I feel like I might have something useful to say about anxiety. If nothing else, I can come up with analogies about how it feels.
Get through the long term disability review. I need to find a way to be calm about this. I also need to find some long term coping techniques so that the next review (and the one after that and the one after that) don't wreck me quite so badly.
Decluttering the house (except the study. That's Scott's). This needs to be done a little at a time. I'm currently trying to get Delia to give up some of her books. She doesn't want to, not even the ones she never reads. I suppose it's hereditary.
Relatively little tasks:
Kindergarten Round-up Feb. 20, time TBD. This shouldn't be a big deal. I called the school, and they promised to mail us information. I think all I'll need to do is show up and fill out some papers.
Post "Zymogenesis" to website. I've formatted the dratted thing. I just need to upload it. Done.
Announce "Zymogenesis" on LJ/IJ.
Post notice about "Rustication" to Ranma ½ community on LJ. (Is there a Ranma community on IJ? Find out).
Send e-mail to updates list "Rustication" and "Zymogenesis."
Rewrite and post kink meme fics. Perhaps I should list the four of them separately, but they're a lump in my head at present.
Write thank you notes for Christmas presents. I'll give priority to Delia's notes.
Schedule mammogram. I should have done this in July. I put it off. Then I lost the referral. Now I have another referral. I just have to do it.
Find a psychiatrist. The long term disability review people want a psychiatrist's evaluation. I'm hesitant to get involved with one because I'm not ready to try medications right now. I have an equilibrium that lets me function in the ways I need to. I'm afraid that tinkering with it will make things worse rather than better. There will come a time when the possibility of making things better is worth the risk of making things worse, but it's going to be a while. Well, unless something else changes to make my illness worse.
Things to watch (that I already have in hand):
Finish watching Ayatsuri Sakon
Finish watching Saiunkoko
Finish watching Buso Renkin
Finish watching Twelve Kingdoms
Watch Honey and Clover
Watch Nodame Cantabile
Rewatch Scrapped Princess
Rewatch Pretear
Rewatch Pretender season 4
Bite sized (mostly writing) projects:
Write up pre-school job - I have disconnected notes. I just need to put them in order.
Finish race in anime/manga essay - have first draft and beta comments
Narnia/Secret Garden fic - have three pages, some handwritten
Amber fic 1 - Merlin and Random, gen, half done
Amber fic 2 - Merlin and Random, slash, half done (three attempts)
Back to the Future fic - have first sentence and concept
write about first Queen of Narnia - definite concept
Read Amy's fics - I need to find out if I have all of them
Comment on Amy's fics
Post Amy's fics
Statler and Waldorf fic - vague concept
Lost Prince fic - vague concept
Demon Diary fic - promised giftfic, no ideas
Amy gift fic - no ideas
Three Investigators fic - promised giftfic, no ideas
Other stuff:
Learn to make granny squares. Afghans would be so much easier if I could do them in small pieces rather than as one big project. The problem is that I suck at counting stitches. Anybody know any easy granny squares?
Volunteer at Delia's kindergarten next fall. I'm kind of scared of this one, but I think it might be good for me to commit to getting out once a week. No more than that. I'm hoping to have fall be easier than right now, not harder.
Plan meals. This would make food shopping easier. Right now, we have the problem of buying meat and fresh vegetables or fruit and not using them before they go bad and of not thawing frozen meat in time to cook it when we need to. Of course, we also hit the problem that, some nights, I simply can't eat whatever it is we've planned. Leftovers going bad is yet another problem. ::ponders::
Try one book that I never thought I would read.
Try a book that I didn't like a while ago and see if I like it more now.
Find writing cheerleaders. Having them helps a *lot*. Jenn's very good for some projects, but she doesn't care much for "Rheotaxis," and her schedule doesn't match mine particularly well. Sometimes, we're lucky, and sometimes, we miss each other online for days at a time.
Learn to use IRC and non-AIM chat programs.
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no subject
Date: 2008-01-13 09:28 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-13 10:08 pm (UTC)