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Cordelia went out for a few hours this afternoon with her middle school friends. They've decided to alternate weeks with movie night on Friday one week and a Sunday afternoon gabfest the next. I think that one of the girls can't do things on Fridays, but I'm not sure.

Scott's asleep. At this point, I don't see a point in waking him at all until morning. He napped a little while Cordelia was out (he provided transportation both ways), but apart from that hour to hour and a half, he had been up for roughly twenty three hours when he lay down to sleep. I'll have to wake him for a little when I go to bed because I have to be able to see which medication bottles are which.

We went to Bob Evans for breakfast this morning after Scott got home and showered. After we got home from that, Scott did the grocery shopping while I started in on laundry. He did the library run after dropping Cordelia off at her friend's house.

Scott having had to work last night means that I still haven't tried taking two of the Halcion tablets to see how that affects my sleep. I'm not willing to do it unless he'll be there during the night and in the morning.

I wrote about 500 words last night. Sadly, I wrote it at the point when I should have been in bed and asleep, so I've been dragging all day. I keep looking at the floor and thinking about lying down there in spite of knowing how much doing that would hurt. I have no idea why my brain thinks the floor is more attractive than the couch. Maybe because I've tried the couch several times in the last two weeks?

We're going to try to figure out how to upgrade Cordelia's laptop. There are things she wants to do now that the machine is too old in terms of hardware to support, and we expect that high school will bring things she actually needs to do that need better hardware. If nothing else, she's taking digital photography later this year. I'm pretty sure we will have a hard time finding software for that that will work on a Macbook made in 2008.

Upgrading my laptop is going to have to wait. We still haven't paid off my current laptop or Cordelia's. We got them refurbished, so we didn't pay full price, but I'm not sure Scott's decision in that regard was necessarily wise because what he ended up getting was only a very little bit newer than what we used to have and stopped being able to advance in terms of OS within the first six months we had them. For me, it's less important because I mostly chat, do email, write, and browse the web. I don't stream much or play games. I don't need the latest bells and whistles in my word processor, not as long as other people can still open and read my documents if I share them.

Scott's thrilled at the idea of me not doing Yuletide. He says that all I talk about during the writing period is my story and that that makes him feel like I'm not actually present. I pointed out that I'm always thinking of stories and that I'm happier when I'm writing. I should have added that I just talk to him about the Yuletide stories because he often knows the fandoms and because they're almost never smut. I do 90% of my writing for any exchange/challenge at points when I'm alone, but my brain never stops churning with story ideas.

I need to try to find a chance to talk to him about this when Cordelia's not around. I feel like I don't have all that much that's mine and like he's saying I shouldn't have anything if it attracts attention. I'm pretty sure that's not what he means, but it's still hurtful and pisses me off.
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Drat. I've gotten to the end of the second chapter of this Labyrinth story for [community profile] pod_together, and that's not an acceptable point to end the story. I really don't want it to go on much longer, and I had thought I could find an ending there. I have no idea what chapter three should involve. So I'll try to work on the other story for the challenge until I figure it out.

I mostly cat waxed yesterday. I think I managed to write about 150 words, and I didn't do much else worth talking about.

I couldn't get back to sleep after Scott got up this morning, so I'm think I should probably try to nap later. We're expecting friends this evening for Scott's Firefly game, and I don't want to be only 30% there the way I was last time we played.

Both of the stories I wrote for Not Prime Time have long, enthusiastic comments from the recipients. It makes me feel as if I didn't thank my writer properly. I love the story I got, but I'm terrible at trying to come up with things to say, so I only managed about three sentences. Hopefully, my writer will realize that I meant it. For some reason, AO3 didn't send me a kudos notification yesterday. I know I got some on the NPT stories, but AO3 hasn't officially told me yet. (And, yes, I checked my spam folder.)

I think that Scott doesn't quite get that, if I don't want to watch a show, I also don't want to listen to it. He's been binge watching the most recent season of Arrow and is going to The 100 next. Listening to the shows in only a little less stressful for me than watching them, and it becomes worse if he's playing a noisy game with shooting and explosions on his laptop at the same time. (I'm not sure that it can really be called 'watching' if the game window completely hides the show window.) He's generally also talking sporadically to me. I don't want to give up the conversation or the time just hanging out together, but...

I think that he deals better with a lot of varied and noisy input than I do because his work environment is noisy enough that everyone has to work constantly at focusing on the sounds that are relevant to what they're doing right then. They all wear ear protection, of some sort, too. Me, I can't hold a conversation in the same room with a dryer running. I've never been able to, going back at least as far as college.
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I'm at 11000 words for the month so far. I'm not quite sure how that happened given that I haven't been working on the things I really ought to finish because of being too stressed about the laptop issues. Apparently, I've been writing plenty on other things.

Scott had to work 3 a.m. to 7 a.m. this morning. I was a little worried when I woke up at 8:30 to discover that he wasn't home yet. I figured he'd probably gone out for breakfast, and that did in fact turn out to be the case. He's been giving one of his coworkers rides home, and they were both working overtime this morning, so the other guy bought him breakfast. Scott really didn't have a good way to let me know without waking me up, and I'm pretty sure he expected that I'd sleep longer. He was only five minutes from home when I got up.

I'm kind of tempted, right now, to lie down again. I'm surprised because, counting hours, I should be fine.

Scott and Cordelia are planning to go see the Spiderman movie this afternoon.

I have one library book due tomorrow that I know I can finish in time to return it then. I can renew it, but it's a manga volume. I'll feel silly renewing that. Also, if I finish it, I'll be able to return everything that's due tomorrow. That never happens, so it will feel like an accomplishment. I've got two other slim graphic novels, both aimed at about ages 8-10, that I should also try to finish. I keep looking at them and thinking that I could finish both of them in about twenty minutes. I just have to sit down and actually do it.

I have two other library items that can't be renewed, but both are due later. One of them, I may not read at all because, although I'm intrigued by the world, the content I expect in this volume has several things that are generally DNWs for me. Then again, it's a novella. It shouldn't take long to read if I can just start. (I'm sensing a pattern here...)

I'm looking at August and feeling very frustrated. There's one day when Cordelia has three places she's supposed to be simultaneously. She's volunteering that day, has a doctor's appointment, and has mandatory orientation for high school. The other option for orientation is the day that they'll be coming back from choir camp, so there's no chance at all of her being able to attend that day. It's four hours back from Interlochen, and orientation for 9th graders starts at noon that day. I can't imagine that they'll get them back anywhere near that early.

I've already complained to the school about the problem of scheduling 9th and 10th grade orientation for a day when all choir, orchestra, and band students can't possibly attend. It's not that they didn't know about the conflict. It's that they don't care.
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And my laptop has decided to malfunction in a new and interesting way. It's been having problems with the charging cord connecting properly for a while and often would just stop charging and go to battery power. Now, if the cord is connected while the laptop is on, it crashes constantly, just going dead as if it had no power at all (in spite of having a charge in the battery and the battery being brand new). Pretty much any minor jostle of the the laptop, the surface it's resting on, the floor near the table where it sits, anything at all, will make the thing go utterly dead.

I can only get it to charge when it's off and not getting jostled at all. I tried putting it to sleep to charge, but it will still die that way, and I don't like the uncontrolled shut down and its attendant risks to my data.

Scott has purchased a part that he hopes will address the problem, but it won't arrive until Monday, and who knows how long it will take him to find time to attempt the repair. In the mean time, I'm going to be online in bits and pieces as my battery lasts. I can do some things from my phone, but I don't get my theredck email there, and there are some irritations about interacting with DW and AO3 that way. I can write a bit in Gdocs on my phone, but I can't get things from Gdocs to anywhere else there.

I'm at 68% power on my laptop right now and am going to try to get a few things done before I shut it down again to charge. Mainly, I want to sign up for an exchange. I looked at doing it on my phone and realized that I'd have to settle for a very bare bones thing with no links or prompts or DNWs because of having to type all of it from scratch. I also haven't yet figured out what to offer, so I need to print off the list of things I considered possible in that direction and mark it by hand. I have enough battery to do that on the laptop, but I kind of think it might be wise to do as much as I can manage not on the laptop.
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My hard drive just died completely. Scott thinks it's irretrievable. He won't have time today to work on it due to family obligations.

Cordelia and I are both feeling terrible, but... Family obligations. Scott is cranky and snarling at everything. Great fun.

I keep thinking there has to be a good day this weekend, and life keeps saying no.
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The afternoon yesterday was laid back. Scott and Cordelia gave me seasons 4 and 5 of Leverage and season 1 of Batman Beyond. Scott and I went to the library around 4:00 and did a little Ingress while we were out.

Cordelia watched The Fellowship of the Ring and was very puzzled as to why people like it so much. She also was very annoyed by the lack of female characters. When Arwen showed up, Cordelia noted that this was the first female character of any note/with lines of dialogue.

On our way to Brighton, Scott took Whitmore Lake Road part of the way with the idea of avoiding construction. Then he decided to go back to 23 because it had looked clear from what he could see of it. That led us to driving through some very slow bits of construction. I'm not sure we actually avoided any construction by taking Whitmore Lake Road at all, so I'm not sure what the point was.

Food frustrations/general crankiness )

I wasn't able to use my c-PAP for the whole night last night because part of my nose is inflamed and hurts terribly when anything touches it. I'm going to apply heat and see if that helps it resolve.
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Pretty much all venting )

The chores I did yesterday were enough to make the tendinitis act up again, so I'm not looking forward to the walking I'll have to do today. Right now, my plan is to take a cab to UHS, get lunch somewhere nearby after the appointment, hang out somewhere (Espresso Royale, probably) until about 2:00 and then get the bus to the hospital. PT is 2:45 to 3:45, so I'll just wait for Scott to be able to pick me up after work. I really ought to make a lunch and take it with me, but I don't want to deal with that.

I've tried ice on the tendon. That hurts all the way up my leg. Right now, I'm applying heat. That's making my calf muscle ache, too, but I'm hoping it will loosen the dratted thing up enough that I can stretch it properly.

My left elbow has started giving me trouble. The pain is at the back of the joint and fairly pinpoint. It is, sadly, probably more tendinitis. I think it's stress from trying to compensate for not using my hands in the ways I normally would.

I didn't go with Scott and Cordelia to Cordelia's PT appointment yesterday. I was so very, very tired that I thought that staying home was a good idea. I haven't generally had the option, so that was nice.

Scott's avoiding pork products now. I'm not sure if he's going to try one more time to make sure that he didn't just have a bug last weekend or if he's just cutting all of that permanently. I think that, if it is an allergy, one more exposure won't make it suddenly as bad as the beef allergy, but I know that such things get worse with more exposure, so this isn't going to be something he can indulge in occasionally.

I'm working on clearing out all of the frozen stuff we've got that contains pork. Scott buys potstickers and spring rolls frequently, and he never looks to see what's in them as long as they don't say 'beef' on the front. It's resulted a few times in me not having easy options for feeding Cordelia's Muslim friends, so I've learned to check the freezer ahead of when I expect to have them over to see if I need to make Scott go out and buy something that will be okay.
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Yesterday was a good news/bad news deal.

The very good news is that the uterine biopsy results came back early and are clean. This means going ahead with the HSG which sounds moderately unpleasant, but I prefer that (and the chance that that might be clean, too) to the alternative.

Venting about OT )

I've got PT at 10 this morning. I'm taking the bus to get there, but I might take a cab back. I would like to be able to do something after the appointment beyond collapsing and staring at the walls. Especially since there's still a chance that Cordelia's friends might come over for movie watching tonight.

I'm putting another thing on my to do list-- I need to write down the things I have trouble with, due to hand pain, so that I know exactly what things I want to address. The two catalogs I have only contain two useful looking adaptive devices, and we already own both. (Seriously, handle weighted silverware would be a terrible idea. I already have trouble with what we have weight-wise because chunky handles were in the year we got married. We got the lightest handles available, but they're heavy and unpleasantly thick. Oh, and apparently there's something terribly wrong with me that I find big things harder to grasp than thin things.) Most of the ones that might apply to my situation are aimed at food preparation and eating and look like they would make both infinitely harder than the pain does.

Yesterday also contained some school related WTF? in terms of PTO emails. At 8:00 a.m., they sent out a message announcing that they want to do a middle school fun night next week on Friday and need volunteers. At 2:30 that afternoon, they sent out a second message saying that they would have to cancel the fun night if they didn't get more volunteers immediately. School runs from 8:00 until 3:00. No parent would have had the opportunity to ask their child or children if they wanted to go. Almost all parents would have been at work during that window, too, and might not have access to personal email or personal calendars or time to consult with partners about plans or to set up babysitting for younger kids or... Well, it's seriously WTF? They couldn't wait twenty four hours for the second email? Or send out the initial announcement with more than 6.5 hours before their panic point?

Cordelia doesn't want to go. I rather expected that. I probably wouldn't have volunteered anyway because there's a chance I'm going to be wrecked by the time we get to evening that day. Also, I can't stand for long, can't do much with my hands, and generally can't do things right now. The jobs they were talking about needing to fill pretty much all involved two or three hours of standing.

Scott considered signing up because they want someone to run boardgames, but with Cordelia not going and with us not knowing what sort of state I'll be in, he decided it wasn't a good idea.
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Health related stress )

Anyway, between this and having a fic to write, I probably won't be answering comments with any regularity until the end of the month or so.
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Is there anyone in the universe who doesn’t loathe Comcast? They now claim that they never set up a service appointment for our address and don’t understand why we want one. The reference number they gave us for the appointment doesn’t connect to anything in their records. Are we sure we’ve checked all of the connections carefully enough? They said they can send someone on Tuesday.

I want to scream or cry or break things or something. I only swore once when I was chatting with the help guy, and it wasn’t really at him. But I want to.

It took me fifty minutes to get through to talk to someone because their website won’t load under our current internet, not as it’s running right this moment. But the site would take 20-30 minutes to error out, so I kept hoping. I ended up turning off my phone’s wifi and using the browser on that, but it meant trying to type on that which… Not the world’s most fun thing to do with stressed.

I’m worried that they’ll 'lose' this appointment, too, because I’m not technically on the account. They gave me a reference number, but they gave us one last night, too, so… Yeah. Meaningless.

There’s a school thing in two hours. I ought to go, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to. I’m sufficiently upset that going out and being around that many people would probably leave me gibbering. I’m going to try an Ativan, but I don’t know. I’ve never tried one when I’m stressed out because I’m thoroughly pissed off and have good reason to be upset.
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And, last night some time, someone broke into our car and stole Scott’s iPod and all of the loose change he had tucked away. He didn’t realize it was gone until he got out of work this evening (after an unexpected twelve hour shift). Scott’s kind of sporadic about locking the car when it’s in the driveway. It’s always locked when I want to get in but apparently not at other times.

I think Cordelia had a decent day, but neither of her parents did.
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I need 700 more words to reach the minimum word count for the WIP Big Bang. I also need to find some sort of ending for the story. It won’t be a really satisfying ending because I’ve realized that this is a small piece of something larger (of course). It’s just that other bits have to be from other points of view or they won’t work.

The chicken is cooked. The dishwasher is running, and when it’s done, I’ll cook some sweet potatoes.

I kind of want to lie down for a little bit, but because the cleaning lady’s here, Cordelia’s in our room, reading, and she won’t/can’t read if I’m in the room, too. (Plus, she prefers sitting on my side of the bed to sitting on Scott’s side.) I think I may go down in the basement and do some shelving since my brain is trying to shut down. I can do that without thinking, and maybe I’ll uncover some boxes I can use to ship the things I want to pack up and mail.

I’m trying to figure out how to get Cordelia to Target to shop for a bathing suit before Sunday. Scott’s working late tomorrow and is probably working during the day on Saturday, so this evening and Saturday evening are the only possible options. Cordelia just needs new bathing suit shorts, if we can find them. It’s a little late in the year, so I’m less optimistic than I might be. I’m not sure what we’ll do if Target fails us. I’m not sure that any of her normal shorts will work instead, and she wants to be able to swim at the hotel.

And, while I was in the bathroom, the mail carrier shoved a bunch of mail into our box and didn’t take any of the outgoing mail at all. I don’t see how he can have missed it being there. The absentee ballot envelopes are large, and the Netflix return envelope is bright red. The mailbox opens with a drop down door, so even people my height (5’2") can see everything inside when standing on our porch. The mail carrier must not have even bothered to look.

Fortunately, our cleaning lady was able to track down the mail carrier before he left the neighborhood and got him to take all three items. But… WTH?
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It’s very, very bad that, at the moment, making a business phone call appeals to me more than opening a document and writing.

Well, at least it means the phone call’s likely to get done…
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Naturally, given that I had to be up at 7:00 this morning, Scott’s phone went off three times during the night. We couldn’t figure out why or how to stop it from doing it again. It went off at midnight, at 12:40 and at 4:15 (Scott had to be up at 5:00). Each occasion lasted only about three minutes, but it was loud.

I managed to deal with two old emails/PMs/comments last night. Both were months old, and both were things that I’d been getting really anxious about every time I thought about answering. Not because answering was unpleasant or anything but because I felt like I was horribly, horribly late in answering and so quite rude. I’ve got two things from April left to answer and one from May and two from June. There are also three things from July, two to be answered and one to prompt me to take care of something that I need to get done. Maybe I can do two more tomorrow?

Scott and I went out yesterday afternoon to pick up some stuff at Kroger and to drop off our library stuff at the Traverwood branch. I hacked several portals on the way home because we took a back road. My returns haven’t, for the most part, been checked in yet which always makes me a bit tense because I remember the time when they shelved all of those things without checking them in and then never found the last one. Traverwood usually checks things in pretty rapidly but not this time. Ah, well. The library opens at 9:00, so I’ll wait and see.

We got milkshakes from the McDonald’s next to the Kroger. Scott thought about Orange Leaf, but we agreed that Cordelia would be upset if we let that slip. I suggested getting frosties, including one for her, but Scott pointed out that that would change our route home and mean I could only hack two portals instead of six.

I need 200000 more points to advance to level eight in Ingress. That means I’m actually kind of hoping for people from the other side to come by and take out the local portals. As long as they do it at a time when I can get to them without half killing myself.

I have a dentist appointment today. My current plan is to take the bus there. I’m still up in the air about how to get home. The #23 won’t get me within walking distance of home until the route detour ends this fall, and I’m not sure about walking from the dentist to where I can catch the #22. I think I can get from there to the part of State St that has restaurants. My appointment is at 11:00, so i’ll be getting there around 12:30.

Stopping for lunch might make sense and would cost less than a cab from the dentist to home (only just, though). If I go to Totoro and get my usual, that will cost (including tip) about $11. Assuming they haven’t raised the prices. Espresso Royale would be less expensive than Totoro but would mean just having a muffin as opposed to, you know, real food.

I know that, after a rest, I can get the rest of the way to the #22 from there. I’m just not sure— Should I walk the extra three blocks and go to the library on the way to the bus station or just catch the #22 at Division? I won’t know if I can make it to the library until I’m nearly there. The bag is currently empty, so carrying it wouldn’t be that big a deal. It would even give me a place for my water bottle for most of the trip.

I did no writing at all during the weekend. When I had time, I was either too tired or found other things to work on instead. I think I’m going to see if I can find a spiral notebook to take with me to my appointment. The dentist’s office doesn’t have wifi, so I can’t easily write on Google docs (there’s an option for working on a given document offline if I set it up while I have wifi, but getting that offline document to upload the new stuff once I have wifi again is challenging).

Scott’s been looking at Ingress maps for the area where we’ll be staying in Chicago. The hotel is in a heavily green area, but there’s more dispute further into the city. Scott’s complaining about the fact that we’ll have to go completely around Chicago to get to and from the hotel, but I really do think that’s better than the other options.

I talked to my mother last night to tell her we’ll be stopping by for lunch next Sunday. I had to repeat the timing about three times. I hope that’s a sign that she was distracted rather than a sign of anything else (I caught her at the end of a day spent trying to install a shower in a bathroom with a slanted ceiling, so distraction seems likely, but she’s seventy).

Cordelia decided that she wanted to skip Brave in order to go to Captain America: Winter Soldier in her alphabetical trip through our movie collection. She skipped several other things that she’s never seen before but knows with absolute certainty are terrible. She just knows.

Scott enjoyed the Star Trek movie quite a lot. It provoked a lot of thought for him about how we, as a nation, define ourselves and what that means for how we deal with the world. I guess this is another movie that he’ll buy and that I will then see well before we could get it from the library or Netflix.
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Damn. Google’s detailed routes aren’t printing correctly from Firefox. Each one prints three sheets with just a single line— the header— on pages one and three and incomplete route information starting on page two. I’m going to have to have Scott buy more paper and see if I can print the stupid things via some other browser. That might work. If it doesn’t, I’m not sure what to do. I’m not willing to spend the time to transcribe the routes into word processing documents, but we really can’t rely on our phones having charge all day. The route home, I don’t need to print again because we only need enough of it to reach 94, and that’s all there.

So, basically, I’ve wasted about twenty sheets of printer paper. At this point, we’ve got maybe forty sheets left, so I hesitate to print anything else at all.
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Oh, lovely. The absentee ballot applications I printed from the city website (it was a PDF) are completely unreadable in places because of garbage characters covering up key bits of information like the date of the election, where to turn the application in, and all of the instructions for filling out the form. Mostly, it’s empty squares, but there are other garbage characters, too. I can almost read the directions, but the other bits are completely illegible. When I saw the stuff where the election date is supposed to be, I assumed that it was some sort of code, but I kind of doubt that now.

I’m going to see if opening the thing in Chrome makes a difference, but I suspect I’m going to have to call the clerk’s office. I’m not sure we have time for them to mail us the application, us to get it back in, and them to get us the ballots before we leave town on either the 31st or the 1st.

Hm. It looks better in Chrome, but the election date is still garbage characters, just very, very tiny ones this time. The printed copy is legible, but there isn’t an election date or a space where one obviously should be written. I should probably call the clerk’s office anyway to complain that the form can’t be printed via Firefox. It’s not as if I was using something obscure like, say, SeaMonkey.

And our internet is being seriously flaky again. I need to get in to find out our precinct number, and I can’t load the site. I really don’t think is down, so I’m pretty sure it’s our internet connection. (And who knows when I’ll be able to post this bit of venting?)
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I decided to make a list of the things that might be stressing me out right at the moment. The thing is that none of these are new. Maybe dealing with the run up to the colonoscopy combined with dealing with Cordelia’s knee kind of activated my anxiety and all of this stuff is keeping it activated? If that’s the case, I have no idea what will help because most of this stuff is not going away. Even the things that have definite dates or otherwise can be dealt with will simply be replaced by other things of the same sort. I mean, I’m sure that we will not cease to have medical appointments at the end of June.

Cutting the list because it’s for me and not likely interesting to others )
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Our cleaning lady has pulled all of the crap out of every corner of the living room and piled it in a couple of bins. I need to go through all of it, but a lot of it is Cordelia’s and so needs her input about what to do with it. Some of the games are aimed at five or six year olds, so I really don’t think she’ll want to keep them— Scrabble, Jr. and the Winnie-the-Pooh memory game just aren’t likely to interest a thirteen year old. We probably won’t get rid of Candyland, but that’s mostly because it’s on a high shelf with about six other games piled on top of it. Digging it out is more trouble than just leaving it there.

I have to walk over to the school soon. They’re doing a fundraiser today that asked people to pledge money for the kids to run or walk for a set period of time, and Cordelia forgot to take her pledge envelope in. It could wait for Monday, but I’m worried that we’ll lose it over the weekend. It’s not as if it’s a long walk to the school. The money being raised is earmarked for sending Cordelia’s grade on a long field trip next year, but they’ve only managed about 2/3 of their goal so far, so I don’t know what will happen. Maybe the class will do some fundraising on their own next year?

Scott seems to be coming down with the same bug that Cordelia has. I’m concerned that I’ll catch it, too, and end up sick on my birthday next week.

I’m at a point with writing at the moment where I want very much to have written but really don’t want to write. It’s not as if I’m getting anything else done, either, so I’m not sure why I can’t do this, but right at the moment, I’m starting to feel sick as I think about trying to put together a story. I really don’t like that— I’m happier when I’m writing, and I really love discovering the story as I go along. I’m just looking at all of my WIP right now and loathing each and every one.

So I’m trying to come up with something relaxing to do. Maybe I would actually find sorting stuff in the basement or the living room soothing. Sometimes that’s helpful. I really don’t want to try to cook anything; it’s too hot, and I mostly can’t eat much right now, so I’m not sure how my body would react if I start working with food. Nothing on my to-do list looks helpful. Years ago, when I was in this sort of mood, going to a bookstore to browse would help, but that hasn’t worked in a long time. Now, I just get frustrated by the fact that I can’t finish books very easily and by the fact that 99% of what I find on the shelves is thoroughly unappealing to me. I simply don’t seem to enjoy what’s currently popular, and bookstores need to stock what people buy.

I’m not sure that, at present, I’d enjoy the books I loved when I read them ten or fifteen years ago. That is, this is likely more me than it is the available books. But I don’t like grimdark. I don’t like urban fantasy. I don’t like epic fantasy. I don’t like military SF. I have seen some stuff mentioned that looks vaguely interesting, but it’s all ebooks, and I’m not willing to do the work I’d have to do in order to deal with an ebook. Right now, the power cord for my ereader has been missing for about two years. I don’t see buying a new ereader when I’ve barely ever used the one I have.

I'm mainly venting here. Suggestions for relaxing things to try are okay, but the ereader thing and the not finding books that interest me thing are mainly me being horribly cranky.
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Bleh. Am I feeling sick because I’m anxious about today’s appointment or because I ate baked beans for breakfast? Both seem plausible, but I can’t do much about the second option. I’ve taken an Ativan in case it’s the first. I’ve got half an hour before I need to call a cab. Hopefully, things will settle by then.

Doing the dishes just now didn’t help because Scott has a habit I can’t get him to break. When he empties a food storage container and puts it in the sink for me to put in the dishwasher later, he always, always puts the lid firmly back on. If I get to it half an hour later, that’s not a big deal, but if I take any longer than that, opening the containers again is, ah, an adventure. I understand it when it’s a container he’s taken in his lunch. He has to close those up after he eats in order not to make a mess of his bag, but this morning’s trouble came from the lidded loaf pan that held meatloaf up until Monday night. Would it have been so hard to set the lid next to the pan? Or anywhere except on top of it?

October 2017

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